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#387713 03/05/08 05:15 PM
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Ker813 Offline OP
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I never thought picking a baby name would lead to fights. But in my situation it has come to that. My boyfriend and I are due on March 25th. We still have no boy name picked out. He likes the name Colin, and Athan. But, I like the names Nathan, Ethan, Aiden, and Evan. I just don't know what to do. He doesn't like anything I like. We can't come up with something we both like. We had no problem with the girl name. I just need some advice as to what I should do.

Thanks!

Kerry

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If he really loves you, there has to be some compromise. Ask him what is it about the names you have chosen that he doesn't like. Nathan and Ethan are similar to Athan. Aiden is the number one baby boy name last year and is very celtic. Maybe go to the baby name site and each choose twenty names and rank them. Then do a compare and see if you two can meet halfway.

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Would you both agree to name the boy after him (boyfriend) or one of your fathers? How about writing all the names you each have chosen, put them in a hat and draw? Or better yet, choose one of your names for the first name and one for the middle name, like Colin Evan or Ethan Aiden?


Walk in Peace and Harmony.
Phyllis Doyle Burns
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Ker813 Offline OP
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Personally, I think he is just being difficult. I offered to name the baby after him. I actually like the name Andrew David. But, he feels that every child should have their own name and shouldn't be named after anyone. My mom keeps telling me to name the baby what I want. She says that I'm the one going through labor and delivery and it is my choice. She said if he has a problem then give the baby my last name and don't have him sign the borth certificate. I'm not cold hearted like that. And as for the name Nathan, he told me that if he wanted "Athan" with an "N" in front then he would have already mentioned it. So this is what I've been going through the past couple of months!!!!

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Just name the baby what you want and it will all work out. He'll get over it. Maybe right now he is just trying to show a strong sense of fatherhood...? Let it go and listen to your Mom.


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Phyllis Doyle Burns
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Tell him he can name the ones he gives birth to. Otherwise, name your baby what you want to name him/her. That's why the mother signs the birth certificate, not the father.

DNA determines parenthood, not necessarily a birth certificate anymore, so whether he's on there or not will not legally obligate him to pay child support. You can give the child your last name, sue for support and still have him pay you. It's not even cold-hearted, it's just a fact.

So, I'm with your mom. And with you. Name your child something you know they will be proud to grow up being called and something you love.


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If you cannot agree upon a name for the baby that is a strong indication you will not be able to agree much on raising the child. Be wise and think this through carefully. You do not want to have a life of conflict and misery or expose your child to one.


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Phyllis Doyle Burns
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Hi Kerry,

The names you like are so similar -- it's really too bad that you guys haven't been able to agree. Here are some ideas:

--You pick your favorite, and he picks his. Flip a coin to determine which name becomes the first name and which becomes the middle.

--Tweak the names you've chosen. Maybe if they're in a slightly different form (e.g., Ayden, Collin, Ythan) one of you will be willing to budge.

--Make a list of 100 entirely new names (ones that are similar to the ones you both like -- 2-syllable names that end with an N). Separately, each of you pick out, say, the 30 you like best. Then get together and see if there was any overlap (hopefully there will be). Those "overlap" names become the new shortlist.

Here are 100 names that could be part of the "start over" list:
Quote:
Ryan, Dalton, Darren, Dawson, Logan, Bryson, Caiden, Dion, Cohen, Alan, Ammon, Amin, Eben, Adan, Alston, Austin, Barron, Boston, Brayan, Lennon, Mason, Calvin, Camden, Camron, Orson, Levin. Carson, Colton, Cullen, Keagan, Milan, Lyndon, Morgan, Dallin, Deavon, Dayton, Declan, Dylan, Draven, Tobin, Craven, Easton, Fulton, Gannon, Hayden, Holden, Tristan, Jaeden, Jaxon, Aaron, Aeden, Jordon, Keaton, Kelton, Keenan, Kenton, Kieran, Korbin, Landen, Jalon, Jason,Lawson, Devin, Eldon, Owen, Kyan, Lucian, Paxton, Payton, Alden, Jaylon, Jensen, Reagan, Rustin, Seldon, Vinton, Watson, Winton, Tyron, Urban, Zayden, Rylan, Soren, Alton, Allen, Brian, Cason, Damon, Gavin, Haven, Hazen, Johan, Kevin, Kylan, Nevin, Orion, Rayan, Roman, Rowan, Tevin


Good luck, Kerry. I really hope you guys are able to work something out.


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Good advice, Nancy. I hope they can work it out and maybe they will - this is just one of the first stumbling blocks that new parents experience and it is not that uncommon.


Walk in Peace and Harmony.
Phyllis Doyle Burns
Avatar: Fair Helena by Rackham, Public Domain

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