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Joined: Aug 2004
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,079
Porn is a problem that is affecting over 80% of couples in the USA alone. I know it doesn't help to say you're not alone but the facts show that it is almost at epidemic proportions.

Next to money problems and infidelity, over-use of porn is a reason many couples separate.


"Allow your dreams to become your plans."

Kristen

Kristen Houghton
Author and Relationship Writer
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Joined: Aug 2004
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Parakeet
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Parakeet
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Helplines for Wives Whose Husbands Whose Husbands Abuse Porn

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"Allow your dreams to become your plans."

Kristen

Kristen Houghton
Author and Relationship Writer
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Joined: Jul 2009
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R
Newbie
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Posts: 2
What should a woman do if her husband locks her out of the bedroom at night so he can look at porn? He has porn all over the house, bedroom, living room,and bathroom. He has DVD's, magazine's and also looks at the internet. He has no regard for my feeling. I have been looking away for a long time now, (35) years. Yes he is no kid, he is 61 years old. Now I found out he is even going to strip clubs spending our money and I am sure making a old fool of himself with the young girls. I thought he would slow down as he got older but it got worse. I just cant look away anymore and it is a shame something like this can destroy a long time marriage. Any one have any comments? He never wants to talk about it with me. He just get angry with i say anything about porn or strip clubs.

Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
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R
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
What should a woman do if her husband locks her out of the bedroom at night so he can look at porn? He has porn all over the house, bedroom, living room,and bathroom. He has DVD's, magazine's and also looks at the internet. He has no regard for my feeling. I have been looking away for a long time now, (35) years. Yes he is no kid, he is 61 years old. Now I found out he is even going to strip clubs spending our money and I am sure making a old fool of himself with the young girls. I thought he would slow down as he got older but it got worse. I just cant look away anymore and it is a shame something like this can destroy a long time marriage. Any one have any comments? He never wants to talk about it with me. He just get angry when I say anything about porn or strip clubs.

Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 275
C
Shark
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 275
Roxy02

DUMP HIM ! He obviously has no regard or respect for you. He takes you for granted - doesn't care if you like it or not - does what he wants to do. This is not LOVE - he is discusting!

My advice is to file for divorce - this is abuse.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

cp

Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 1
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IMHO divorce is not the immediate answer, but I also know that every marriage can not be saved. I have been married for more than 12 years and have recognized the pattern with the pics and the way every action related to this material is defended (or, much more often, abruptly denied). I am not asking for a divorce, nor do I want one - but I am going to live near my family so that I can have some support. I hope he will follow me. I am not giving up on him... I just can't do this alone. He doesn't have it all over the house or anything - in fact he's very secret about it. I don't even approach him about this one subject anymore, but it's very frustrating. We have gotten over other addictions and even cigarettes have no hold on either of us - for years now. This is the only thing left, and it's the only thing he's never admitted to. I don't care how "bad" it is on some "scale" of heroin to ice cream. He's hiding it from me, and for him I think that is the bigger part of the addiction. I have told him he doesn't have to hide it, and I've been sure not to say anything to him, and... well, just every way imaginable to help him feel like he doesn't need to hide it but all I ended up with was the realization that he must feel like it is bad enough to hide, and he likes that idea. I have put this off forever, it seems and I'm just out of other options at this point. I am moving. My door will always be open for him if he will prove to me that he's in therapy and actively working on this addiction. I will not file for a divorce and if he wants one I will try to talk him out of it. I love him unconditionally, and on the surface our lives are the happiest they've ever been - but I physically can not live with this addiction.

Last edited by ms_cha; 08/07/09 02:01 PM.
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