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Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: elshello] #617822
08/16/10 11:15 AM
08/16/10 11:15 AM
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To start with hang in there. I had to breastfeed my daughter for a year, every two hours like clock work also, because she refused any sort of bottle, nipples, pumped or powdered milk. It was a challenge, but two days after her first b-day i told her time to take the sippy cup, she did fine with that.
To this day my daughter still doesn�t sleep through the night she is 2 years old now, for a week or two she will finally sleep through and then comes back to the old routine, what i have discovered is she always seemed to have something to why she doesn�t sleep through, teeth,growing pains,ect. I�m exhausted but i have to hang in there also what else can we do, my friends all say it will get better but i�m still waiting also for that day. So take it from someone like yourself, we just have to HANG IN THERE.


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Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: elshello] #627918
09/12/10 11:54 AM
09/12/10 11:54 AM
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Luxembourg
Originally Posted By: elshello
One thing I haven't seen discussed in this thread is the breastfeeding experience. Breastfeeding was the darkest time of all for me.


At least you gave it a try. I was "forced" to try too, when I was still in the hospital feeling like s***t, (by the "it is the best for your child" guilt ridden talk from everybody from midwives to my husband)), but I hated the feeling so much, that I couldn't stop crying so I stopped after 48 hours. I felt guilt-ridden, inappropriate and a horrible human being for months, but not enough to regret my decision not to do it. With the bottle my son would sleep up to 5 or 6 hours at night with 2 months. As depressed as I was (yes, I also hated being a mom, never wanted to be one) I cannot imagine the physical and psychological torture of going through breastfeeding on top of everything else

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: Jennyt] #653586
01/04/11 01:50 AM
01/04/11 01:50 AM
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Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: tvdoctor] #658655
01/27/11 05:55 AM
01/27/11 05:55 AM
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with all due respect i really dislike it when people say "hang in there". i mean, really what for? it is so awful...i think it's not worth it. i am planning to commit suicide in the next couple weeks. life is not worth living in motherhood.

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: Madness68] #658792
01/27/11 07:26 PM
01/27/11 07:26 PM
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Madness68,
I'm glad you wrote in. I am not qualified to advise you, but I want to say how sorry I am that you are feeling this way and am pleading with you to please seek professional help. I have read that if one is experiencing thoughts of suicide, one�s brain chemistry is mostly likely not right, which means your brain is currently not functioning as it should. Getting help for your condition might entirely change the way you are currently feeling.

I think what people mean, and what I mean, by hang in there, is to offer some hope that things will get better. Often, what seems hopeless might not seem so hopeless in a few months more time, especially if help is received. Many mothers who were in your situation are now doing much better.

Whether you realize it or not, I'm sure you have people in your life who love and need you and would be shattered if something happened to you. Also, no child wants to lose a parent in this way, and whether or not you feel you are a good mother or feel you are even loved as a mother, I�m sure your son or daughter loves you dearly.

If not for yourself, I hope you will seek out professional help for those that love and need you, and again, I�m really sorry you are in this situation. Don�t blame yourself � it�s not your fault. If you were physically ill, you would seek help in getting well � I hope you will do the same here.

I don�t know your faith, but I am praying for you... praying for you to have strength and to soon feel love and joy again. I am sure you have felt those things in the past, and I believe you can again.

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: bcd] #663692
02/17/11 08:30 AM
02/17/11 08:30 AM
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You are kind of missing the point; she didn't want a baby to begin with. She could have the best baby in the world but if she never actually wanted to be a mother, it would still be the biggest mistake ever.

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: optimus2535] #663706
02/17/11 09:06 AM
02/17/11 09:06 AM
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I am really shocked to hear such kind of problem from so many women. Motherhood is known to be the best part of a woman's life and you are regretting so much. That's really unbelievable. What's the fault of that little child who is not able to speak even. What makes you so frustrated. Just find out the route of their problems instead of just getting irritated.

Last edited by Kaycee Will; 02/17/11 09:10 AM.
Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: Aurelia] #663708
02/17/11 09:24 AM
02/17/11 09:24 AM
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If everyone is criticizing you, then they clearly have a problem but you don't have to let that problem be yours. Respect is a two way street and if they are not showing you any, then they don't get any from you. Someone questions how you raise your child, there are a lot of responses you can use to make it clear that they are crossing a boundary and that won't be tolerated. They are not polite but since they are not being polite to you, you don't owe then any courtesy. Your opinion was not solicited Do I tell you how to raise your child? No. Then don't tell me how to raise mine. Are you the mother/father? No? Then shut the [censored] up until you are [censored]. When I want your opinion, I'll ask for it. Are you unable to mind your own damn business. No? Well, I am sure the police can help you, let me do you a favor and call them for you right now so you can get the help that you need. I could go on but I think you get the gist and if someone is messing with your child or harassing or stalking you, that is just what the police are for.

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: squidpup] #663709
02/17/11 09:34 AM
02/17/11 09:34 AM
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squidpup - I am so sorry to hear about your situation. Everyone who told you how wonderful it would be lied, I don't know why (I guess they wanted to ruin your lives like theirs were ruined). Those people who told you how wonderful it would be, bet you wished you had asked them if they would adopt your kids if you didn't think it was as wonderful as they said (I bet the look on their face would have clued you in). It is probably too late for the safe place law so you might want to consider adoption.

Re: Need support - I hate being a mom [Re: Heather - Chinese Culture] #663710
02/17/11 09:38 AM
02/17/11 09:38 AM
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Someone just did not say "have a kid" and they did it. They were pressured and bullied and ostracized and harassed for resisting the unsolicited advice to have children by friends, family, society, and none of them actually asked whether or not they wanted children (because they don't really care).

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