BellaOnline Forums Family Moms Why are so many moms ambivalent?

I believe the test you are referring to is the one the schools offer. His name is on the years long waiting list. So I went to the doc as I was told I could get it that way. No, but they will prescribe pills. A psychologist will do the test for around 3500$ if I chose to go that route. However helpful the info is to me, it won't change teaching styles and I don't feel confident that the test results would give me useable info. They are used in schools to allow your child to get a reduced amount of questions on a test, etc. which is important while a child is struggling.

My whole experience as a school mom has included talks with my kids as to why they can't have all that food [censored] that their friends get. It is one big frustration for everyone of us.

That is how some junk creeps in, so you don't always feel like Orgre Mom. And, so they will eat something at school. We know the clothing labels peer pressure. Well, food lines have pressure too. You really don't want to be the weird kid with the wholesome looking food. They solve that one by not taking it out of the backpack! So the problem becomes eat (not perfect)something or nothing.

Hello back,
No actually the NEPSY is done by a neuropsychatrist � the school will not do that � and, yes, it is extremely expensive.. What it does is allow you to go to the school to get an IEP (Individualized Education Plan), and if ADD is detected, then you qualify for a 504 Plan, which gives you a way to get modifications and accommodations (that you'll have to monitor and update yearly with the school, same with an IEP). This all falls under the Americans With Disabilities Act, so it is a legal document.

As for the school food issue, yes, that is hard. But I will say this (as the mom of a teen), if parents don't start enforcing their family's values and beliefs early on, and what is OK and not OK in their family, they will have a very hard time indeed when kids become teens and start to face making choices about drinking,smoking, pot and sex. I am the ogre mom at times (in a loving way, and with the understanding that kids do experiment), but that, I believe, is my job. If my kid starts in with the "everyone else's mom says..." I just shut that right down!

Sounds like they're only responding to the flawed educational system.

I use my debit card online because it has a VISA symbol.

If you should decide to homeschool, I do homeschool consulting. I don't want to sound like an ad, but this is something I do. I live in FL and just had a consultation with a mom in Boston the other day. Homeschooling sounds like a wonderful option for your son. Don't underestimate yourself. And remember that homeschooling is NOT abou recreating school and sitting at the kitchen table for 6 hours a day.. That's one of the biggest misconceptions. You'll find you can accomplish the same amount and better meet his needs in only an hour or two a day, leaving time for him to be a kids and pursue his interests. See yourself as the FACILITATOR for his learning (keeping his learning style and interests in mind) and he will succeed.

As for labels, when you're getting started, ignore the box with the RDA information and percentages. What you care about is just the straight ingredient list on the back. And ignore the text that's on the front of the box or package. Once again, go to the back and read the ingredient list. Looking for additives like high fructose corn syrup and artificial dyes. If you can't pronounce it (or if you have to try to hard), it's probably not good. If the ingredient list is miles long, it's definitely not good.

Have you read my article on improving your diet gradually?

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Yes this is the same test. The schoolboard has the neuropsychatrist do these tests for the reasons of accommodations, etc. My point was that I can't get accommodations till the test is done and the waiting list is long.

As for me being a pushover mom, I'm not. My kids would rather take a sub or one of the advertised cool lunches than dinner leftovers or a salad. I don't think that's awful. And they (my oldest,) are presently hiding, and not eating anything that doesn't look like a cool lunch at the large public lunch room.(new school) The healthy food understanding is coming. They are learning. As for pure foods, I try. And will try harder. That is a big issue that needs women to help each other, even to find products etc, not condescend.

We had goats for milk and grew veges once, we have downsized. Milking goats at 5AM bites. I still grow fresh veges, I planted a garden Monday. I didn't say I am a pushover that can't feed my kids. When my kids say "other kids moms..." it is because they are looking to me for an explaination or discussion. My oldest is 14 as well. And I think is doing amazingly well with emotional growth.

Jen, I wish I could reach out and hug you. More for me than for you, I suspect. I was becoming more and more tightly knotted. You know the kind you get tied up in and don't realize till someone pulls the string and sets you free. Well, you have. When I stop spinning I will be able to decipher this info more clearly.

Yes I did read that article on gradual improvement and it was something that made sense and is do-able. Presently on overload, cause I'm thinking about home-schooling now. Got to go! THANK YOU

Hey, as I can walk now without being wobbly for the first time this week (flu) I am grocery shopping tomorrow. Friday is followed by 4 days home for the kids. Weekend/Victoria day/then inservice.

Wish me luck. The label thing I don't know. I really don't remember in my recent past ever finding a label that didn't have some ingredient that shouldn't be there. Maybe tomorrow I'll be divinely guided. Let's hope. I planted lots of spinach in my little vegie patch. I can't wait!

Kat, when I said I was amazed at my child's growth, I forgot about physical. I don't know how tall you are, but (at 5'5'') hugging my baby by putting my head against his chest is just Weird. But, I'm adjusting.

Are we still talking about women getting their [censored] together, or am I the only one who needs to?

I need a housekeeper.

Priorities! That is a tough one. I run with the things that I am passionate about, when I am passionate about them. My mom was the same. Dust bunnies are bunnies too.

I understand that I will (sadly) never have a �sparkling� house. (without a maid) I force myself to run through routines. I do this quickly so I can get on with my life. And I sometimes get them done Before things Really look like they need some doing. Add to the mix that I have one child that is really disorganized. He drops everything, everywhere. I think that I will work on his organizing skills, instead of picking up after him.

I moved a few months ago from the country, where no one ever rang my door bell to an affluent area of a large town. My door bell rings often and unexpectedly. (We are not Well Off, we got a good buy when prices of all houses, in all areas, were way up. A sensible purchase.) The point is a lady, my senior by 15 or so years, lives in an amazing mansion around the corner. We have become friends and I have discovered that she thinks dust bunnies have a right to life, too.

A friend of mine had a maid once. To get her money�s worth she never touched a toy. They stayed where they dropped for a week! At some point she came to terms with that not being healthy for anyone, and went back to cleaning her own house.

I think when I am striving in a healthy, happy way it is easier to give up some of my precious time. House chores are then a �self wind down time� for me. It�s all the perspective you take, or can take.

I just realized this response was addressed to me!! LOL I'm J-a-n.

I'm so glad you found the information helpful. At least school is letting out (is Canada on the same schedule?) and you've got some time to do some research and soul-searching.