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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 742
Gecko
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Gecko
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 742 |
Hear, hear, Elise! I'm sure Jan is a very nice person and obviously a nurturing mother, but I know I stopped reading after the first sentence or so, thinking "this doesn't apply to me." First, I have no control over what my mother chose to do in the 1960's. That's completely moot at this point. And then I just find it ironic and unnecessary to bombard us with a list of facts that have little bearing on our decision to have kids or not. Granted, it may be a factor, but only one of many as we've all discussed again and again. Generally, if that's someone's only deterrent to having kids, I would think it would be a pretty easy obstacle to overcome.
As far as the double standard regarding women's breasts - yep, there sure is. Frankly, until the public is desensitized to seeing exposed breasts in general - sexualized or not - it's going to be a double standard and people are going to be uncomfortable seeing bare breasts in public regardless of the reason. And why not? We're taught as kids that no one is supposed to see or touch our breasts because they're part of sex. As you get older, it's exciting to see something you aren't supposed to see. When you grow up, they become an integral part of the sexual experience. But as soon as someone has a baby - boom! - we're not supposed to think of them in a sexual context anymore. Obviously people don't reprogram that quickly. I don't know that the problem lies in the overt sexualiztion of them (because they are a part of sex) as much as in the inherent contradiction of purpose and the societal taboos that surround them.
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 998
Parakeet
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Parakeet
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 998 |
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 138
Jellyfish
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Jellyfish
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 138 |
Another formula-fed and JUST FINE THANK YOU VERY MUCH poster checking in. Really, if you want to breastfeed...FINE. I, however, really get sick of the lactivists out there who feel it is the ONLY way to go and have to make big, public displays of breastfeeding in public. A little discretion would be appreciated. Especially in restaurants where I'm paying to eat.
Jez
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 862
Parakeet
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Parakeet
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 862 |
I would be a "bad" mom too...I wouldn't provide a different DVD screen on the back of each front seat so each kid could watch a different movie as we drive around town...I wouldn't provide ANY DVD player in the car! I wouldn't get my kid a cell phone at the age of 10! LOL! I would be so mean, in my kids' eyes! Cindy I think i would be in horrible trouble with other parents if I had a kid.
I would likely not be able to only breastfeed, because I do need to have a job. Baby could not come to work.
My kids would not be involved in 300 activities and wearing pads and helmets while doing so. I think kids need to learn to spend time by themselves too..otherwise they turn into needy adults. And really, i rode a bike and a skateboard before pads and it did not seem like a big deal--and my parents were very overprotective!
Elise, you make an excellent point about Jan's post. The only thing that information provides us who don't plan to have kids is a reason to think that mom's that don't breastfeed are doing their kids a disservice....that and i guess contemplate what issues i can be at risk for! My mother did not breastfeed me or my brother and I sure hope she is not viewing lists like that and feeling guilty. I don't judge my mother for her decision not to breastfeed, nor will I judge anyone else.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,002
Koala
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Koala
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,002 |
Hmm..I'm a 40F and breastfeed in public without showing any of my breast. Hmm..not sure who these women you're seeing are or why they're nursing like that..maybe they were wearing tank tops?
About making a baby drink from a bottle, not all babies can do this and many moms don't want to take the chance. You see, the baby can experience nipple confusion which means that they sometimes won't go back to the breast.
Also, some women don't get much milk when they pump which makes pumping impossible. I'm one of them. I have lots of milk but could barely get an ounce with a pump.
Finally, we live in a society in which people go to Hooters and lingerie commercials are shown during the day (think Victoria's Secret) but women like me aren't supposed to breastfeed in public? Hmm..Definitely a double standard there. So someone would be happy to see me on a beach with a barely there bikini top but not discreetly nursing my baby.
We live in a sexually charged society and it's sad because views like these lead some moms to never even try nursing. I used to work at a zoo and in both places that I worked I saw a lot of boobs hanging out of shirts. Covering the baby BEFORE unbuttoning your shirt is how these moms should have handled it! I have also seen it from moms when I taught gymnastics. I would bring the girls back at the end of class and a mom would be breastfeeding and barely covered. As far as nipple confusion and not going back to the breast, then they could continue to drink breast milk out of a bottle. What do you do when the child goes into daycare, or you get a babysitter? Run over there every 1/2 hour so that the child doesn't have to drink from a bottle? And as far as half-naked girls walking around, well, they aren't topless, are they? I agree that our society is "over-sexed" but there's got to be a better way to breastfeed in public.
Last edited by lngilbert; 03/19/07 09:17 AM.
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 71
Amoeba
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Amoeba
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 71 |
I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum from you gals - size A all my life. I have finally grown to like them just the way they are and would hate to see them change either way...you hear a lot about women getting bigger boobs after having kids but some also lose what little boob they had in the first place!
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 998
Parakeet
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Parakeet
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 998 |
I'm with you, Joz. I belong to the barely a B (and only in some brands) club. But the possible changes caused be having babies is not at all appealing. I can live without a size boost... besides, parenting is far too high a price to pay for something so trivial!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,002
Koala
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Koala
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,002 |
Joz - I'm a B, and I like it that way! Any bigger and they would get in my way with running, gymnastics, etc.
My friend is barely a B - but you know what? Before she had both of her children she was a D!
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 570
Gecko
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Gecko
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 570 |
I'd far prefer to be a C than a D...but, failing that, I'm wondering if I could get the detachable models? So much better for the gym!
8^)
Elise
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 297
Shark
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Shark
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 297 |
How about inflatables, so you can change the size according to what you're doing or wearing? That'd be my choice. Of course, if you get on a plane, that could be problematic... 
"I may not agree with what's on your bumper sticker, but I will fight to the end for your right to stick it." --Unknown
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