BellaOnline Forums Family Siblings Materialism - reducing shopping to reduce stress

I love it really*

*maybe

I don't know about the rest of you, but the pressure to be materialistic is pretty intense where I live. And I'm by no means in a booming metropolis.

If your child does not have outfits that cost XXX amount, your vehicle is over a few years old, and your stroller or other baby gear is not up to a certain standard you're out. No inclusion in mom's activities or playdates.

I enjoy nice things and keep up with the celebrity moms and baby activities along with everybody else. But whether or not a person has the latest gear is not a factor as to whether I like them or want to hang out with them.

I think the feeling of being left out is part of the pressure to shop till you drop.

I agree. I've caught myself buying stuff for my son that is so cool just so he can show his friends "hey look what I got." Only thing is... his friends usually have the same thing or something cooler. Round and Round you go and what do you get for it? Stress

So the question now becomes, does it matter what people think, are we not too old to want to be in the cool and popular group? We are so scrared about being left out and missing out that we forget what we do have and who we have.

What is more important, working your butt off (or making our husbands work longer hours) to keep your kid in outfits that cost XXX or having the security to be able to spend the time with your child?

As for celebrity moms, I can think of a hundred better role models for all mothers out there. Don't be so busy wanting and searching for what others have that you are miss out on what you've already been blessed with.

Hmmmm...celebrity moms. I just wrote an article the other day that discussed how much more down to earth they seem to be these days.

A few of the star moms seem almost domestic compared to the movie stars of say..the 50s and 60s.

Remember the tell all books that Joan Crawford and Betty Davis' children wrote? If they are to be believed, having a movie star mom was pretty rough at times. Proof positive that having loads of material goodies and privilege isn't all that it cracked up to be!

The celebrity moms of today seem rather devoted in comparison and hopefully they are teaching their children some values as well.

We can only hope.

I watched a documentary on the bedrooms that celebrity kids have and it was overboard. John Travolta's kid has 2 huge bedrooms, one decorated with a jet plane as a bed, the other a western theme. Some rap star's 15 year old had a whole mansion of his own fully decorated with outlandish things, like a Gold pool table with a loony toons felt top. Kate and Tom have spend a small fortune on Suri's nursery.

Although parents are not as dismissive, oppressive or just not there as in the 50'60's they are putting alot more emphasis on material things then in the past.

There are some exceptions, but accross the board kids are learning whatever they want mommy & daddy will get it for them.

These celebrities have tonnes of money, should regular families try to outfit their kids in the latest fashion craze just because their favorite celebrity?

I do a lot on baby theme rooms, so I don't think they are bad. A gold pool table? Oh please.

Theme rooms if used properly can be a great conversation starter between a parent and child. A way to build a bond. For instance, if the room was decorated in a jungle theme, mom can point out the animals, birds or whatever and talk to baby about them. Teach them about the rain forest or the ecosystem and just talk...but you can get all that done without spending yourself into the poorhouse!

If you max out the credit cards, you won't have any time to spend relaxing with your child whatsoever!

Exactly. My kids have wonderful theme rooms that I painted myself and had a lot of fun doing it. But they each only have one and very modestly done.

The emphasis on who has what and keeping up with the jones' creates too much stress on the pocketbook for most young families. When you spend everyweek in the mall looking at stuff, you tend to forget what you do have and only concentrate on what you don't.

I found when I stopped shopping so much, stayed home more, turned off the negative stuff I became happier, more content and closer to my kids.

Spring is here!!!! YAAA Time to have a garage sale and get rid of all the stuff my kids don't even look at.

I will not be replacing it.

My son learned a lesson this week on taking care of his stuff. For Christmas he got a Tamagotchi. He had it a week and lost it. He had to earn enough credits in order to get another one - took him 2 months. He had that one less then a week and someone stole it out of his school bag. I did replace this one, first because he didn't ask me to and second because he did put it where we told him to.

Well he had the third one a month and then took it outside and left it on the back bumper of my van. We found it on the Blvd - it was road kill. No more tamagotchi's, whether he works for one or not. I'm done with those dumb things.

Ok, I'll bite what's a tamagotchi? ;-)

A virtual pet... extremly hot last Christmas. The whole city (Calgary) sold out first week of December and no one had any until the end of February. Even then you'd call and when you got to Toys R US there were very few left.