Everyone can learn to retrain their brain. It's how brains work
. Your brain is part of your body. You can learn to wiggle your fingers and toes. You can learn to not be afraid of spiders. It's your own brain. You control your brain.
Each time you see a spider, say out loud that spiders deserve love. That's how training works. Really. Say it. Every time. Whatever else you do, say those words. Saying words has an impact on your brain for all sorts of psychological reasons.
Today I was doing yoga outside and the cutest little baby spider carefully crawled onto my hand. It was scared. I smiled at it told it it was OK. I told it to go find a tasty bug to eat. Off it went. It didn't mean me any harm. It was exploring its new world.