This thread got me thinking and now when I open my mouth to air some discontent with something, I ask myself, "What can I do differently to affect change?"
If I keep doing what I'm doing, I'll keep getting what I'm getting. To expect things to change without changing anything is dumb.
So now, I ask myself what can I do differently?
About your post above, Lisa, in a restaurant situation, I always give benefit of the doubt to the server as he/she can get busy and forgetful. It isn't complaining to repeat your request. It isn't complaining to notify the manager that one of his/her servers needs to up his game.
To me, complaining is whining, yes, but just going on and on without doing anything about the situation. Gosh, I hate that.