For people who have been reading my various posts, you will know that i have been constantly moving for around a decade. My life has stacked up uncontrollably behind the need to always deal with packing, unpacking, cleaning, sorting, finding homes for my things, dealing with storage sheds, finding doctors, making my way around new places, trying to find friends, dealing with utility companies, painting walls, ripping up carpets, setting up my offices, struggling with getting mail to me...

I may as well stop there. I think the picture painted is clear. I am surprised i have been able to get any work done at all.

This year I put a stop to the crazy-go-round by buying my own land lot here in a town of my choosing. I have my RV parked on it and i live in that while I slowly make the run down single wide mobile home here livable. I am in no rush with that, since the RV is a fine small home.

Anyway, my goal in a year is to not be staggering around under the weight of being dreadfully behind in my work life.

At this point in my year I have now been at the new place two months and am getting certain things under control. I'd like to look at ways to get my work plate under control. By next year I want to have a system whereby I am not feeling guilty/crazy about being behind, where things perk happily along without stress.

Good for you Jill. It's important to know what you want and to just say enough of the distractions and just work on getting it. I went through that a few years back and finally started living life on my terms too. Feels good and eliminates practically all stress, depression, anxiety, and especially insomnia.

You're doing awesome!

Thank you for the hopeful thoughts Monica. it was a big step, a long time in the making, to decide to live life on my own terms. When will i have the mess cleaned up? I want to live smoothly, or at least not have these crazy problems that get compounded.

I know it will take time but i am just so tired of all the fighting to get to this point.

So I am trying to figure out how to get everything that's stacked up behind me off my plate. I know baby steps are the way to go, but I still feel overwhelmed. Just when I thought I was set and ready to work on my big catch up plans, there is a death in my little family.

It's like some kind of weird coincidence. I don't know.

I am just starting with small things, grunt type things, right now. Stuff that doesn't require much thought or effort on my part.

Actually I think right now I want to take a walk. Do I have to put clothes on? Can I walk in my PJs?

Jilly -

Rather than think of life as a smooth perfect world that "messes" keep interrupting, it's important to realize that life *is* messy! Life is the daily ups and downs and sideways that go on. I bet if you asked 300 editors here what happened in their past "normal" week that all sorts of chaos occurred. Nothing ever goes as planned. That *is* life. Life is about things happening.

The key is for us to get you to a state where you have the emotional energy and the time space so all those life occurrences aren't a "straw on a camel's back" - that they are accepted in the flow as what life does, and things you then draw into the rest of your daily activity and handle.

Remember, you've made huge progress already! Think of all the chaos in your past, which is now behind you! Life right now is almost mirror smooth compared to the things you juggled before!

You have a mailbox! You can buy permanent checks! You have control over your time - something most editors *dream* about having! No 9-5 job that you're required to go to, no kids to get off to school, no nagging spouse demanding things. You in many ways live in a dream world

So don't think of it as having chaos because you're finding a doctor and finding a vet and so on. This is the opposite of chaos! You are experiencing a putting things into their places! That is awesome! So you're *already* making tons of steps. The more things fall into place, the more empty space will open up to allow you to be healthy, and to build your new foundation.

You are still seeing movies every week which is your key job - so that is already so set that you don't even count it!

True, RunPee is perking along and is paying the mortgage and utilities. And I am working on trimming down those utilities.

I am starting to get the 'writing ahead for my topic' thing under control. I started a group for accountability for that.

Doing the FB client work is going on easily and fine, all of a sudden. I am starting to get better with the the invoices.

Editor Help is perking along, and although i am drowning in a sea of new releases, it's easy relaxing work i can do in batches.

People still want press releases written by me that I have promised to do and I really need to just sit down and make them happen.

I actually have been getting somewhere with the RomanceClass stuff I work on (just need to upload my responses - which i want to do this weekend).

There are other things that are hanging around, being unattended, but I am going to not stress over them until i have my writing ahead and press release writing goals met.

Then I can relax a little and prioritize the other things that need to be done. And with I have only a gazillion things that need attending to - lots of other blogs that i should be monitizing...

This made me think of something I used to say when my kids were little.

"Life is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and I'm the napkin."

HA HA HA!!!

Good posts - make interesting reading - thank you ! I shall just get on with the pile of stuff on my desk slowly but more definitely ! Thanks ladies!