I didn't think it possible, like probably many of you, but I am in love with two very different men. I realizes its their differences that make that possible, that's not what I'm asking. I need to find a way to fall out of love with one; one of life's hardest challenges. So the first I've been dating for three years solid and here and there before that, but we have been best friends for six years. I love him for his compassion, loyalty(ironically enough), funloving personality, among others. But our relationship was strained about two years ago when I cheated on him, just a kiss, but still its horrible and I know that. And was with someone I had once slept with, but not while we were dating. This brings me to the second guy, I love him for his boldness, intelligence, among other things. He's been my other best friend for about two years now, and he's the only other person I'm completely comfortable with. Now the second guy would my ideal guy, but like most people he has flaws. He has problems staying in a relationship without cheating, and has been with ALOT of other girls. He's not someone I see myself as being able to ever have a future with, and the first guy is. After I cheated on my boyfriend, I distance myself away from the second guy, as difficult as that is, since we are both a part of the same organization. And things were going really well again in my relationship, until last night. I hung out with the second guy for the first time in a long time, and it just reminded me of how much I care about him. I need to find a way to let those feelings go, while still seeing him regularly, since we attend the same university and are both apart of the same small organization.
In my opinion, you are getting confused. You need to get away from both these guys for some time and think about your future.
I don't think there is anyone way for you to "fall out of love" with one these guys. The best thing you can do is take care of yourself and put some distance between you and them both.
How about 3 for 3? Meet some other guys to maybe fall in love with. Let these two guys be your friends. There are lots of fish in the sea and since you've found two you could love, there are likely lots more out there. My guess is that you're still young enough (how old is too old? Never!) to go fishing!
Confuseddj, ever heard of polyamory?
Who say you can't love two people at once?
http://www.polyamory.com/http://www.xeromag.com/fvpoly.htmlNow think carefully - It has to be a three-way agreement, mind.....
I don't believe in that. It's fine for some people, but not for me.
Well in that case, that's cool.
But your dilemma remains, then. You're back to being with either one or the other, or none.
Choose.
And hope they see eye to eye with you.
Good Luck.
Just think of future, think the right man for your future not a feelings for your other people at present. You need a person who will respect you, who will be faithful and loyal. You just having an emotional feeling but for me bottom line is a person who will respect you in return. RESPECT
VINZ
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Sometimes when we distance ourselves, we understand our real feelings.
Hi. They are probably right. I think you need to put some distance from BOTH of them. This way you can think without being distracted. I am currently in a similar situation you are in..... only in my case, it's my husband who's torn between 2 loves (me and the other woman). So, I can give you some point of view of how it feels from the other side.
Does your boyfriend know? One way or another, you need to make a decision. The longer it gets, the harder and the more painful it is. There's no easy way out of it. One way or another, whatever decisiuon, one of them will be hurt and you will be hurt too. But you need to decide and stand by your decision and just move forward. You need to make every effort to move forward.
Good luck to you.