BellaOnline Forums Relationships Domestic Violence I'm sure it's wrong, but...

Hi. Where to begin... I've been in my relationship for 8 years, and love him deeply. He's my first true love, we met when I was 18 and I'm 26 now. I have very recently admitted to a couple of friends that I think that some parts of the relationship are abusive. I feel that I am betraying him and only telling others his bad parts. Most of the time his behaviour is quite jokey, he'll call me names (stupid, dumb), pretend to punch me but stop before contact is made, smack my bum or put his hands around my neck so that, momentarily, I can't breathe properly. Other times it gets worse when he is angry at me. Recently, I needed to tell him that I had plans on a weekend he wanted to go away. I was so nervous about telling him because I knew he would react badly. He started calling me names, blaming me, not listening, then told me he didn't want me there. It escalated to him kicking me, hitting me in the back, throwing my car keys at me, pinching/flicking me, then denying me a fair proportion of the bed to sleep. Similar things have happened before, and though he apologises the next day, we never talk about it. I know that his behaviour is not normal, but has anyone else experienced similar? What did you do? Can he change? Will it get worse? He's not a bad person on the whole, and we have a house together so it's not easy, but I don't want to live like this for the rest of my life.

Truth is that you will not live like that rest of your life, if you continue to go that path you are walking now will only get worse. You need to stop ignoring problems you have and try to talk to him that all what he do to you in not loving thing, and if someone is loving you 100% would not do that what he does, so you have here very big problem of lack of love in relationship. And also you have issue why you do not love yourself because if you love yourself you would not stand and let others to abuse you. Also you need to see do you want that this abuse continue because of money and look how its go worse every day or you will give your happiness priority. My advice is to feel every emotion you have in your soul when its come, for bad emotions you need to get in state of grief to cry all out and in process of crying ask God for Dive Love to enter your soul and have faith in process and all negative emotion will leave you and you will do more loving choice in your life and happiness will come as product of Gods Love. And grief can take from couple hours to couple weeks depends on humility and readiness to feel every bad emotion. But remembers Gods Love is key for cleaning your soul and to get it you need only ask for and have faith that you can receive it. Even you can say God if you exist and if you have Divine Love that you want to give to me, and if that Love will make me happy please fill my soul with that Love as much as my soul can take it, but all that need to come as your desire, as your emotion, not as thought, because god communicate with us only by emotions. Hope that this post will help you to find your happiness.