Channel List
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
News & Politics
Religion & Spirituality
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies
We take forum safety very seriously here at BellaOnline. Please be sure to read through our Forum Guidelines. Let us know if you have any questions or comments!
Newest Members
oqalyx, wilbanks, KajalMehta, Kreakyjoints, TaylorAnn
57884 Registered Users
Forum Stats
57,884 Registered Members
417 Forums
115,992 Topics
825,026 Posts

Most users ever online: 615 @ 04/22/15 10:11 AM
Top Posters (30 Days)
Nancy Roussy 248
Michelle - Teen 154
Mona - Astronomy 145
Deanna - New Age 124
Connie - ADD/Sandwiches 71
Ally-Home/Holiday Cooking 66
Susan - Meditation Editor 54
Tracy - Mental Health 48
Lisa LowCarb / VideoGames 36
Angie 26
Ad Income Supports Charity
Topic Options
#801249 - 01/17/13 11:55 AM Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun
michwas Offline

Registered: 01/17/13
Posts: 1
My ex husband pulled a gun on me in September. I reported it this week. He is in Law Enforcement. The problem is that my family does not believe me. My own mother thinks I have lost my mind. She says I should have let it go so I can get Child Support. She says since he did not shoot me then he did not need to be punished. I am in counseling and tried to tell her I am the victim here. There are a few other incidents this year after our divorce (he pushed in my house in front of our son when I had a male friend here) as well as verbally abusing me in public. He graduated the Police Academy in Septemeber and the weekend after was this incident. I am scared that in the future if he sees another car at my house he would indeed use the gun. What can I do during the investigation? There were witnesses to this...how can I make my family support me? I need support..

#801268 - 01/17/13 03:22 PM Re: Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun [Re: michwas]
Elleise - Clairvoyance Offline
BellaOnline Editor

Registered: 04/13/05
Posts: 4021
Loc: TX
It's difficult, which is hard to explain, when you wait or decide not to file charges for whatever reasons...you don't want to see the person in jail, you don't want them to lose a job, etc. You just want them to get control over their anger - help basically.

This is a good forum for support. DV isn't a pleasant thing to go through let alone acknowledge or sometimes even having open discussions about w/friends and family. However, you can come here to vent, reassess, etc. as well as get some ideas when you feel alone.

For right now, if there's an investigation, really there's nothing you can do to alter whatever they find. There would have been more of an affect way back when. I did the same thing. No record...I just wanted him to get help.

But, for yourself and even though there's an investigation what you CAN do is get to a DV counselor which usually lies somewhere w/in the HS department of your area or a DV hotline..

You may, depending on your area, need to go outside of that to avoid any possible biasedness. smile
Karen Elleise
Clairvoyance Editor
Clairvoyance Site

#804061 - 02/01/13 11:06 AM Re: Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun [Re: michwas]
HappyMe09 Offline

Registered: 08/12/09
Posts: 17
Sometimes family just sux. Even friends - especially when there is a separation and/or divorce happening. You were right to report. He needs some help quick. If he doesn't remember WHEN the right time is to arm himself, he needs to go back into training. Gee, thanks mom - right? You might want to not have male friends - purely platonic or whatever at the house. For your safety. Their safety. YOUR CHILDRENS Safety and well-being. Don't add gas to the fire. Meet elsewhere, far away. Please don't give this hot head another reason to be a bad cop. You don't have to take his abuse. Call a hotline. A church. A sympathetic neighbor. My daughter records my soon to be ex - and his explosions. I feel your pain about the verbal abuse, too. You might need to get the court involved - with a restraining order. You don't let these episodes happen in order to get child support. Sheesh. He HAS to pay for it is the law. If he doesn't, he goes to jail. The support is for the child*ren. What is wrong with your mother?? Good luck. You will need it.

Edited by HappyMe09 (02/01/13 11:08 AM)


Want to reply? Register as a Forum Member - it's quick, free and fun!
Brand New Posts
Lisa's Daily 10pm EST / 8pm MST Meditation
by Lisa LowCarb / VideoGames
02:58 PM
Teens and The Holiday Table
by Michelle - Teen
01:37 PM
What do you Have for Breakfast?
by Ally-Home/Holiday Cooking
Low Carb
12:59 PM
Christian Bale/Cate Blanchett New Film/Trailer
by Angela - Drama Movies
Drama Movies
12:57 PM
Jennifer Lawrence To Direct
by Angela - Drama Movies
Drama Movies
12:53 PM
Happy Thanksgiving
by Ally-Home/Holiday Cooking
12:47 PM
Spiritual Quotes
by Debbie-SpiritualityEditor
10:38 AM
The Goddess
by Debbie-SpiritualityEditor
10:28 AM
Happy Thanksgiving - in space
by Mona - Astronomy
07:48 AM
Gingerbread House to Sew
by Cheryl - Sewing Editor
07:39 AM
Register to Post!
Want to post? For security reasons you need to Register as a Forum Member. It's quick, easy and free!
Forum Activities
Book Clubs
Trivia Contests
Who's Online
0 registered (), 74 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Ad Income Supports Charity

| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2015 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.