Channel List
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
News & Politics
Religion & Spirituality
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies
We take forum safety very seriously here at BellaOnline. Please be sure to read through our Forum Guidelines. Let us know if you have any questions or comments!
Newest Members
Citrine Jenifer, bananarichards, Nataliew88, Silvercalifornia, Beatlejude65
57812 Registered Users
Forum Stats
57,812 Registered Members
417 Forums
115,683 Topics
822,647 Posts

Most users ever online: 615 @ 04/22/15 10:11 AM
Top Posters (30 Days)
Nancy Roussy 353
Deanna - New Age 316
Allyson - USACook/HomeCook 193
Mona - Astronomy 151
Michelle - Teen 149
Susan - Meditation Editor 50
Alice - Weight Loss 48
Tracy - Mental Health 42
Connie - ADD/Sandwiches 41
Jana - Creativity Editor 38
Ad Income Supports Charity
Topic Options
#801249 - 01/17/13 11:55 AM Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun
michwas Offline

Registered: 01/17/13
Posts: 1
My ex husband pulled a gun on me in September. I reported it this week. He is in Law Enforcement. The problem is that my family does not believe me. My own mother thinks I have lost my mind. She says I should have let it go so I can get Child Support. She says since he did not shoot me then he did not need to be punished. I am in counseling and tried to tell her I am the victim here. There are a few other incidents this year after our divorce (he pushed in my house in front of our son when I had a male friend here) as well as verbally abusing me in public. He graduated the Police Academy in Septemeber and the weekend after was this incident. I am scared that in the future if he sees another car at my house he would indeed use the gun. What can I do during the investigation? There were witnesses to this...how can I make my family support me? I need support..

#801268 - 01/17/13 03:22 PM Re: Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun [Re: michwas]
Elleise - Clairvoyance Offline
BellaOnline Editor

Registered: 04/13/05
Posts: 4017
Loc: TX
It's difficult, which is hard to explain, when you wait or decide not to file charges for whatever reasons...you don't want to see the person in jail, you don't want them to lose a job, etc. You just want them to get control over their anger - help basically.

This is a good forum for support. DV isn't a pleasant thing to go through let alone acknowledge or sometimes even having open discussions about w/friends and family. However, you can come here to vent, reassess, etc. as well as get some ideas when you feel alone.

For right now, if there's an investigation, really there's nothing you can do to alter whatever they find. There would have been more of an affect way back when. I did the same thing. No record...I just wanted him to get help.

But, for yourself and even though there's an investigation what you CAN do is get to a DV counselor which usually lies somewhere w/in the HS department of your area or a DV hotline..

You may, depending on your area, need to go outside of that to avoid any possible biasedness. smile
Karen Elleise
Clairvoyance Editor
Clairvoyance Site

#804061 - 02/01/13 11:06 AM Re: Law Enforcement Ex Pulls Gun [Re: michwas]
HappyMe09 Offline

Registered: 08/12/09
Posts: 17
Sometimes family just sux. Even friends - especially when there is a separation and/or divorce happening. You were right to report. He needs some help quick. If he doesn't remember WHEN the right time is to arm himself, he needs to go back into training. Gee, thanks mom - right? You might want to not have male friends - purely platonic or whatever at the house. For your safety. Their safety. YOUR CHILDRENS Safety and well-being. Don't add gas to the fire. Meet elsewhere, far away. Please don't give this hot head another reason to be a bad cop. You don't have to take his abuse. Call a hotline. A church. A sympathetic neighbor. My daughter records my soon to be ex - and his explosions. I feel your pain about the verbal abuse, too. You might need to get the court involved - with a restraining order. You don't let these episodes happen in order to get child support. Sheesh. He HAS to pay for it is the law. If he doesn't, he goes to jail. The support is for the child*ren. What is wrong with your mother?? Good luck. You will need it.

Edited by HappyMe09 (02/01/13 11:08 AM)


Want to reply? Register as a Forum Member - it's quick, free and fun!
Brand New Posts
Zombie Outbreak Ahead!
by Jana - Creativity Editor
1 second ago
2015 total lunar eclipse - now past
by Michelle - Teen
40 minutes 33 seconds ago
Heavenly Art
by Mona - Astronomy
Today at 09:46 AM
Hunting the Light
by Mona - Astronomy
Today at 09:37 AM
First and last letter Worldwide Recipe Game!
by Mona - Astronomy
American Regional Cuisine
Today at 09:22 AM
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014)
by Nancy Roussy
Action Movies
Today at 08:15 AM
Home tips to become beautiful
by Nataliew88
Beauty Basics
Today at 07:10 AM
Which is the best online store to buy clothes?
by Nataliew88
Women's Fashion
Today at 07:02 AM
True Happiness
by Nancy Roussy
Today at 06:12 AM
Reasons to Celebrate
by Nancy Roussy
Today at 06:07 AM
Register to Post!
Want to post? For security reasons you need to Register as a Forum Member. It's quick, easy and free!
Forum Activities
Book Clubs
Trivia Contests
Who's Online
1 registered (Jana - Creativity Editor), 74 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Ad Income Supports Charity

| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2015 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.