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#792175 - 11/10/12 03:57 PM How Marriages Handle the Bad Times  
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,755
Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading Offline
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Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading  Offline
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Renaissance Human

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,755
Kansas USA
Lori, this article is filled with the wisdom of the ages. I am going to include a copy with every gift card that I give newlyweds. It is a classic.

I am going to post a link on my fb account.

How Marriages Get Through the Bad Times

Last edited by Connie - ADD/Sandwiches; 11/10/12 04:06 PM.

Connie Mistler Davidson-Editor-ADD/Sandwiches/Reading
Attention Deficit Disorder
Sandwiches
Reading
Avatar: Hope~Even when conditions are harsh, hope can bloom.

My EBook link.
Building School Success with ADD EBook Link




#792188 - 11/10/12 05:52 PM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,963
Lori-Dreams Offline
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Chipmunk

Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,963
Connie, you humble me. Thank you so much.


Lori Phillips
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Bellaonline.com Dreams site
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#792387 - 11/12/12 07:12 AM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,024
Elleise - Clairvoyance Offline
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Elleise - Clairvoyance  Offline
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Elephant

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,024
TX
Getting through the bad times...

Passions are usually flying when they're there on top of emotional let downs and physical obstacles.

When I used to counsel, I would say two things:

1.) Imagine, yesterday, and today you wake up with your parent, partner, etc. no longer there. Say due to an accident or health issue.

2.) Alter your view. Instead of objectifying an individual as a parent, child, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, whomever it may be a channel has become established, etc.

Step away and from an arial view, see them not as a title, but a person.

If you're in danger, however, just acknowledge what you see reflected in the mirror. That's what they're there for...

Last edited by Elleise - Clairvoyance; 11/12/12 07:30 AM.

Karen Elleise
Clairvoyance Editor
Clairvoyance Site
#792516 - 11/13/12 04:53 PM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 4,796
Debbie-SpiritualityEditor Offline
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Debbie-SpiritualityEditor  Offline
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Elephant

Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 4,796
When I was married we went through many challenging times. My husband and I talked a lot, confided in each other, and tried to maintain a sense of humor. We didn't lose the affection we had for each other, and we remained respectful. Life wore us out at times but the love remained.

Had we been more dedicated to the intimate part of our relationship it may have weathered the very last storm, his mid-life crisis. Live and learn.....


Debbie Grejdus
Spirituality Site Editor
Spirituality Forum Moderator
#809146 - 03/02/13 10:13 AM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 41
Maggie25 Offline
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Maggie25  Offline
Newbie

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 41
West Australia
There are some challenges in a marriage that can wear you down so badly that it affects your health. That's what my repeat cheating husband did to me. Now though his health is also failing. Karma's a B*i**, and it serves him right. The wounds are still too fresh and sore to close, but I know time will heal the pain, but not the memory. Forgive, but never forget. You could leave yourself wide open to further mischief from your partner if you forget their trespass' against you. Blessings Margaret

#811581 - 03/16/13 11:08 PM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,691
Lori - Marriage Offline
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Lori - Marriage  Offline
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Koala

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,691
Orange, CA USA
I'm sad to hear you went through that painful experience, Margaret. It's all too easy to say we should forgive and forget when people hurt us but you are right to self-protect, especially when those people are repeat offenders. At some point, this becomes abuse and we become victims. You were wise not to let yourself be a willing victim.


Lori Phillips
Marriage editor

BellaOnline.com Marriage
Twitter: @BellaMarriage

Dreams editor
Bellaonline.com Dreams site
The Dream Collective
Dreams: What are you trying to tell yourself?
Twitter: @tweetdreams4u
and @flutterby03
#813949 - 03/29/13 07:02 PM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Maggie25]  
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 4,796
Debbie-SpiritualityEditor Offline
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Debbie-SpiritualityEditor  Offline
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Elephant

Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 4,796
I had a cheating husband too. Once a cheater always a cheater.


Debbie Grejdus
Spirituality Site Editor
Spirituality Forum Moderator
#814155 - 03/31/13 12:45 PM Re: How Marriages Handle the Bad Times [Re: Connie - ADD/Sandwiches/Reading]  
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,691
Lori - Marriage Offline
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Lori - Marriage  Offline
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Koala

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,691
Orange, CA USA
Debbie, I don't know if I agree with that. People are capable of making a one-time mistake and they are capable of changing.

Chronic cheaters, however, have psychological or emotional problems that are difficult to overcome and hence, your statement then would be true about this population.


Lori Phillips
Marriage editor

BellaOnline.com Marriage
Twitter: @BellaMarriage

Dreams editor
Bellaonline.com Dreams site
The Dream Collective
Dreams: What are you trying to tell yourself?
Twitter: @tweetdreams4u
and @flutterby03

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