Ouch...ouch and double-ouch!
I "
feel" for this situation. I have 2 clients (given permission) to speak generally, going through similar circumstances.
The son, who recently moved away, in Cheryl's situation, could have been a barrier, that kept things connected on some level.
The "youthful" spending, hair and clothes...that's almost a strike 2 and facebook, probable meetings, etc. (in my book) would be strike 3. But that's just me.
What to do?
Emotionally, as far as confrontationally, I would strongly suggest
nothing but for the fact, you're noticing changes. Don't go poking around. Instead, outsmart the situation.
Reason being: defenses, defending of actions, even more fighting and triggering justification for doing
things out of anger and covering actions up, comes into play. If it's all out in the public right now...the bulb hasn't quite gone off yet
Secondly, nothing is
LESS attractive to a man, pulling away, than a desperate woman clinging to their pant leg (figuratively speaking). Even if you're the most independant woman in the world, "pining" isn't attractive, when a person is going in another direction.
What I
WOULD do, is begin protecting some of your assets. Open up an account somewhere that's all yours, even stowing certain things away here and there.
I'd also start breaking up the normal "routine" around the house, myself, by not always being where I'm expected, hours of the day, making dinners all of the time, etc.
I'd use the opportunity to explore myself and see as well, is
THIS all there is and
ALL I WANT TO BE?
I may be perfectly content with who I am, but when the grounds shift, moving with them instead of against, keeps you on your feet!
And if
HE begins noticing your absence, a new look, clothes, hair style, what have you, simply tell him he's been of inspiration to you. You'll look great and feel better just for having tried something new