In 2012, I have learned that I am a little bit passive-aggressive. I mean, I have a few more cheeks than others to turn. So, I do. That said, I tell others about my situation to see if their reaction to the situation is the same as mine. Then, I turn the other cheek until I am backed into a corner and come out w/a single TKO punch for a solution.

I'm indecisive, which causes me to be a bit scattered and that opens the door for my Candida to set up shop.

I like new things, variety, edgy, and creative. I enjoy diversity (homogenization is overrated to me). Yet, when change is thrown into the pot I am stirring, I need 5 minutes to throw a tantrum before I can adjust the recipe for amazingly, yummy results.

I'm a people pleaser.

I think this means I need to be a bit more planted and firm.

What have you learned about yourself this year?

I want to fix things. When someone is in trouble and needs a solution, I tend to jump in and take charge. It's all part of a co-dependency problem. I'm learning to "let go and let God."

Lynn,

That's a huge undertaking. Letting go and letting God. I hope you are amazingly successful at this. We tend to forget that the stressful situations are lessons for the persons that are stressed. When helping is easy, we are doing our part on our path. When our assistance is stressful, we are interfering and now getting our own lesson.

Thanks for posting Lynn. Let us know how it goes.

You are very correct! By stepping back, I've lessened the stress on myself. I am looking forward to personal growth during the remainder of 2012. Thanks for your support!

Finally I need to concentrate on myself instead of neglecting my needs as a person, a spiritual being, and as a woman. I need to heal and get stronger, attain inner peace, and be who I am meant to be. It is not easy to figure all of this out, so I am taking it one day at a time and being kind to myself the best I can.

Cassie-

That is a task so worth the investment at almost any cost. Women tend to be nurturers and forget to nurture themselves.

I hope you figure out what thing helps you to care for you with a short period of time and something else when you have more time.

Keep us posted.

For the short term I am just trying to be kind to myself and keep my stress level down. I am so burned out that I can't handle much stress anymore. I am trying to get my feet back under me so I can make important decisions in my life and get myself moving again in a positive direction.

One day at a time......

You can do it Cassie!

You can do it because you have so much inside of you to contribute to the world. You can do it because you and your animals rely on the give and take of one another. You can do it because the Universe is conspiring to assist you in living your best life.

You can do it simply because you want to and doing it will open the door to doing so much more.

{{{hugs}}}

I've learned I only have so much mental/social energy I can give to 'real people' in live time. And that when that limited span is used up, I start to melt down. It triggers all the worst aspects of my mental illness when I allow myself to use up these reserves.

I have learned to dole my people-time out very very carefully. I am still learning. It's starting to help though.

Jilly-

That's a good one. You are not alone in this one.

My father died five years ago and I have not been able to make space in my life for the new family members that arrived with his death. My people-time is limited. Many of the nuances that come with trying to shift and adjust and balance and make room for new people that want to become permanent fixtures in our lives can be daunting to say the least.

Just within the last few years I have realized that while I love social events, alone time helps me to process my encounters and put all of my pieces back in order before going out into the world again.

The dances we do with others are created to teach us more about ourselves. While we are together, we impart nuggets of truth, experience, and wisdom upon each other. I treasure that with every encounter and still, I retreat afterwards.

It's been said the introverts recharge from alone time and extroverts from people time. So even though I can be very excitable and gregarious, I am most definitely an introvert.

These things are not as apparent through the casual observation of others as we think.

Full agreement here Jilly.

I am hosting or attending a social event at least 3x per month. Add to it, the homeschool gatherings that occur weekly for my girls.

When I host, my guests tend to stay hours after the party should have ended. And, when we vacation, there tends to be lots of tagalongs (fun, fun, fun), sometimes as many as 15.

No one knows that afterwards, it takes me at least 24-72 hours to recover from an event I've hosted (24 hours for a party, 72 hours or more for a vacation).

Yes, absolutely. I need to actually plan in downtime/alone time after too much interaction with others. It's something I only this year learned about myself, but knowing it now really helps.

For example, today was an 'alone' day. I was busy yesterday and will be the same all the way though to next monday. yeesh! So i carefully guarded my day of non-socializing today.

Writing in the forums doesn't count.

My mistake is, I don't really plan it. I just find that I can't do anything but retreat.

I'm on vacation now with others. I'm in the middle of a two week whirlwind vacation. I've been trying to plan alone time while on the trip. Right now though, I am realizing that I need to also plan to have downtime when I return and I need to let my family know that I will need it.

Think I'll send a text to my babysitter and plan some time off while my husband is at work or school.

And Jilly, you are right; the forum does not count.

I love the give and take of our forum conversations. They fit right into alone time.

Im 16 :) and what i think i went through was a bit complicated. But from the past few years , the mixed events made me aggressive and some kind of rude. Though, this behavior was for less people but i used to lose my self really quick. This affected much of my life, like my family. Then, slowly but gradually i realized this all is going a bit too far, and let me add this i never shared or nor i do now my really personal secrets and feelings. That kind of makes people think im tough and rough but on the inside im really sensitive and some kind of emotional too. With all these dramas in my mind, not sharing how i fell because people will see me weak i just made this all bump onto my brain which caused a great deal of temper tantrums and rudeness at times. But , then i patched up with a really good friend and sooner the better i got closer to my friend . He really taught me how to be a tolerant person and deal with patience, not like he taught me but his attitude was kind of like that. So, i kind of got opened up and few other dramas like that . hence this all made me suppress my anger and sorrow into happiness and fun. So what i learned was patience and tolerance is really important and one should try their best to bring it up in them. :) Chao

I am an introvert and I find that I need a good amount of alone time for thinking, de-stressing, relaxing, and finding solutions to my problems. Too much people time for me makes me very stressed and unhappy. I do have to dole it out in small doses, and I have been accused of being anti-social, but it is just who I am. I care about people, especially my family and friends, but I do need adequate alone time for peace within myself.

Mashal-

Welcome and thanks for starting in the Inspiration forum.

Patience and tolerance are huge. Replacing tantrums and rudeness with happiness and fun is even bigger.

Being 16 can find you in a very emotional space in life. It's a wonderful time for self-reflection. That said, being 16 can also find you in an extremely wise space in life. Moments alone allow you to assess and edit and tap into that spiritual voice that leads to days that seem to get better and better.

Kudos to you and your friend. To your friend for being an inspiration and to you for recognizing it.

This might be a good time for you to read The Alchemist, by Paulo Coehlo. I didn't read it until I was 30. I found it to be an easy read and a poetic story that inspired me to recognize and utilize opportunities in life. In my 40's I understand the tale even better. At 16, you should gather some beautiful insight to the journey you are on. I think your wisdom will grasp this tale and provide you with new radar on life.

Congratulations for getting to know you at such an early age. May your journey be bright. And may you continue to grace us with your presence and wisdom.

Hey Debbie-

Being an introvert is in. Knowing that you are an introvert and how to make it work for you is priceless.

Thanks for sharing.

Debbie, this is exactly me! I could have written that. How cool.

Hi Again!

In case you had not noticed, the Inspiration Site is beginning a Book Club July 1, 2012.

The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz is an awesome read for learning more about ourselves. I've read it 3 times and each time, I learn something new about me.

Read it and join the forum beginning July 1st. Hope to see you there.