A very warm welcome to the Self Development Forum !

Do you struggle with saying the right words when giving and taking compliments? Compliments are closely associated with self esteem and self confidence. The self development article below discusses more, including how to give compliments in a sincere way and how to accept them so that both parties benefit.

See: Compliments � Giving and Taking Them

I'd love to receive your feedback so do add your comments, queries, thoughts, etc., to this Forum thread. I look forward to hearing from you!

Great article Joy - simple and to the point. I found several familiar feelings on both side of the coin - I now hope to give and take compliments more graciously.

Thanks

Hi Susan, thank you for your feedback - I�m glad you liked the article. (JOY)

I love compliments. They are like food to me. I never understood why some people can't accept them.

I also give them out freely.

I'm great at giving them but can't stand getting them. I often feel that the person giving them wants something from me. I say thank you and accept it but deep down I'm always thinking why are they really saying that, what do they want from me. I think this has to do with working in bars for nearly a decade and just seeing people at their worst.

Also working in health clubs for ten years hasn't helped. A compliment in a health club usually means somebody want your money or your clients or free training.

I'm working on just accepting without reading into things further. Not easy for me! Great article.

Hi Jilly, this can be a vicious circle as people can then find it difficult to give compliments to someone who can't accept them. (JOY)

I was horrible at that until my husband kept after me to stop denying compliments. It was a matter of low self esteem, I suppose.

But then something dawned on me.

I realized that people feel good when the recipient receives their compliment with gratitude and sincerity. People like to make others feel good and we rob them of that joy when we don't accept their compliments.

When I saw that, I began to accept compliments more readily. I say, "Thank you so much for making me feel good." Their compliment is a gift and our acceptance is a gift to them.

I've learned to say 'thank you' with a smile. It's been hard but practice makes perfect.

Hi Monica, glad you liked the article! I think that a lot of people are skeptical when they receive compliments for the reasons I mentioned in the article. If compliments are given sincerely and are accepted in the right way it is a win-win situation for both people. (JOY)

Hi Lori, yes, a simple "Thank you!" with a smile is indeed one of the best things you can do when given a compliment. (JOY)

Sometimes, I add, "Thank you. I really needed that right now." And they know what is true--that they make a difference in other people's lives. A small act of kindness can save a life.