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#669417 - 03/11/11 03:01 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: cc1980]
Christine - Miscarriage Offline

BellaOnline Editor

Registered: 03/20/06
Posts: 5
I'm sorry for your loss. People try to make you feel better by saying it's not so bad since you were not far along. I had miscarriages at five weeks and also at sixteen weeks and honestly, they were all devastating. It does get better eventually but it's not something you just "get over" even though it seems like people expect you to do just that. Hang in there.
b]Christine Beauchaine[/b]

#670878 - 03/16/11 09:29 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: cmlong3]
g_n_ellis Offline

Registered: 03/16/11
Posts: 1
Loc: Madison, WI

#671256 - 03/18/11 07:05 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: cc1980]
aliak Offline

Registered: 03/18/11
Posts: 1
@ cc1980 I had a miscarriage this past Saturday, tomorrow will be one week. I was 8 weeks pregnant and found out when I had to go to the emergency room. I woke up Saturday night and my pants were completely saturated, I thought to myself.. What is going on here? I ran into the bathroom to discover it was all blood. I had a bad experience in the ER with the way that I found out what was going on. However I can completely understand where your coming from when you say that you feel helpless, I never thought that it would be this hard considering that I was not trying to get pregnant. I had not told anyone other then my mom and boyfriend up until yesterday. I told a friend, she ended up saying to me at least it happend early enough. She had also said it was my bodys way of saying its not ready right now. After getting off the phone with her I was more upset then before I had called. Nobody knows what runs through your mind until it happens to them. I think about it constantly and wonder why it happend. Im coming to find out that you don't get over something like this, time slowly heals. I feel like a part of me is missing, and am taking this very hard. When you said that your partner changes the subject I can relate, I can't get my boyfriend to say much of anything about the situation. This has been a very hard week for me,(as im sure you can all relate) as I found out I was pregnant and that I was having a miscarriage all in one night.

#671473 - 03/19/11 05:42 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: g_n_ellis]
cmlong3 Offline

Registered: 03/11/11
Posts: 2
I am sorry to hear about your loss. I know how hard it is to go through, and feel alone and distant. Right now you need support, especially from your partner. Don't give up hope and know that you still can try when you are ready. Take as much time as you need to heal, and you will always hold a place in your heart for this pregnancy. Even though your sister experienced some unfortunate times, doesn't mean that you will. Remember that everybody is different. My sister experienced 2 miscarriages and then went on to have 4 healthy children. Hang in there, and keep your head up. I know it is easier said then done, but prayer and faith can bring miracles. It's all in God's hands:)

#672453 - 03/23/11 04:27 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: g_n_ellis]
Christine - Miscarriage Offline

BellaOnline Editor

Registered: 03/20/06
Posts: 5
I'm really sorry for your loss. Lots of miscarriages happen really early but that doesn't make them any less sad. It sounds like you have a really good handle on what's normal for your cycle, so you're probably right about the loss. I doubt that there was anything you could have done or not done to cause your miscarriage. Sometimes (most times actually) you can do everything perfectly and still suffer a miscarriage. Although I'm not a geneticist I believe that in most cases, having only one gene in a genetic mutation doesn't cause problems. I have one gene of the MTHFR mutation and thought it could be problematic for me but that wasn't the case. Hang i there.
b]Christine Beauchaine[/b]

#672456 - 03/23/11 04:32 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: Christine - Miscarriage]
raynamitzi87 Offline

Registered: 03/23/11
Posts: 2
Loc: West Palm Beach, FL
So sorry for your loss, sincerely hope you feel better soon

#674949 - 04/02/11 07:45 PM Re: early miscarriage feel so helpless [Re: cmlong3]
debra74 Offline

Registered: 04/02/11
Posts: 1
Hi there, I am so sorry for your loss. I just had a miscarriage too and I understand how awful it is and although it was very early for me it does feel like part of me is missing too. I went to the doctor with a really bad strep throat etc etc, I told her that I had had some strange bleeding 2 weeks beforehand and that perhaps it had been a miscarriage,she said it didn't sound like a mc but she didn't know what it was,she did a urine test,later that day someone called me and told me it was positive, I was shocked and delighted, I went back in the next day and the nurse and trainee doctor were congratulating me. The doctor said it was unlikely to be a false positive but to make sure I should get my bloods taken that day and three days later.The guy who took my bloods asked me if I had picked out names. I got a phonecall 6 hours after the second bloodtest to confirm that I had misscarried and was no longer pregnant- devestating.For 4 days I had thought I was pregnant and my baby was already gone. I think that loss will always be with us but we will learn to cope with it. I am not religious but I now firmly believe that my baby had a soul(for want of a better word) and is happy somewhere. Be kind to yourself this is not easy. Don't forget that we are also very hormonal. On a very superficial point to add insult to injury I have put on about 5 pounds in the last week and am told this is normal after a ms. I would not presume for a moment that you cannot have perfectly healthy babies after a mc,my doctor told me that most women have at least one in their lives and also that it is not our fault.I am a very healthy fit person and had a baby three years ago with no problems. So although it does feel like it is our faults -it is not.Life is just very cruel sometimes. Take good care of yourself xxxxD

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