BellaOnline Forums Family Senior Living Caring for your senior grandparent

In 1999 my grandfather passed away at 72 of cancer. My grandparents had been married for over 50 years. At the time of his death she had never been alone and i was worried that she would pass away soon afterwards so my family moved in with her. It was myself, husband, 2 yr old daughter and 11 yr old son. We stayed with her from 7/99 until 10/02 when i couldn't take it anymore and bought a condo in southern california to get away. At the time my sister had moved in with her so she wasn't alone. In 6/07 i went for a visit thinking i would stay for a week or two but ended up staying and taking care of her until she recently passed away. It was one of the hardest things of done. I have had a lot of resentment for the family and now that she has passed i do not want anything to do with family again. I feel i have done my part. I am closing the chapter and want nothing further to do with any of them. They werent around when she was alive much and i just want to wash my hands of them and be done. Would like some input from those or advice to get me through this. Cant deal with the family because they just dont understand my anoymosity for them and what i really have done.

I haven't been through this but it sounds incredibly difficult and frustrating to feel so alone when you needed help and support from family. I'm the one who lives farthest away from aging parents and feel guilty about not helping more.

Whatever your relationship ends up being with the family, you should take pride that you stepped up to the plate when no one else would and maybe go from there. I'm glad for your mother's sake that she wasn't alone at the end.