You need to take yourself out of the environment in which you are constantly being criticized because that is no way to live. If your family is criticizing you every time you go to their house, stop going to their house. They should get the hint but if they ask, tell them you are sick tired of the constant put-downs and unsolicited advice and criticisms stripping away your self esteem and you will be happy to resume visits when they can stop belittling and demeaning you and start treating you like a human being; until them, you will not be visiting them and their visiting privileges to your house are rescinded. As for total strangers, well, they don't deserve explanations or courtesies because they clearly have no boundaries. I simple "Go to hell" or "get lost" should do but you can get creative. "Are you the mother/father of this child? No? When you are, then you get a vote. Until then, mind your own business and I won't call the police and have you throw in jail." When people harass you, well, they should know better but if they don't, that's what the police are for. As for your husband, sit him down and have a talk with him about how his constant criticisms and damaging your self respect and your sex drive and you will not allow it. No one has the right to do that to you and let your husband know that you won't tolerate it. Listen to what he has to say, ask him why he married you if you thinks you're stupid, incompetent, or whatever. You are his wife, why is he not supporting you and putting you first instead of tearing you down? Why is he listening to strangers instead of you and taking their word over his? As I write this, it occurs to me that you need a marriage counselor. But you need to stand up for yourself or they will be walking over you forever. If you have to yell to get your point across, go ahead, stop restraining yourself, lose your temper, yell and swear if that is what needs to happen to get your point across and get these arrogant people who are under the delusion it is any of their business to leave you alone.
Edited by optimus2535 (02/17/11 10:54 AM)