BellaOnline Forums Family Child Abuse How Are You Doing?

freemenow,
I'm so happy to hear that you have a support person! That's awesome! It is strange how so many families are so divided and you're right, there are those that abuse and those that don't tell or talk of the abuse. Then, there are those that reach out and support the victims, just like your Uncle is helping you now. Thanks for letting me know. I'm so happy for you. I hope your Uncle Gary gets better too!

I'm actually doing very well. BUT I am so angry right now; my father not only abused my brother and I, he was a sexual predator. Which, of course, means that he assaulted others. And, over his "career," Ithere's no way of knowing exactly how much damage he did. About 2 years ago, one of my best friends suddenly broke off all contact with me. Changed her phone number, just dropped off the face of the earth as far as I was concerned. What happened, I find out recently, is that someone told her about an incident involving my father (the person knew the connection between her and me). So although I wrote her and explained as much as possible, she will have nothing to do with me. Period. She has NO CLUE what she is doing. She's playing right into his hands; he derived pleasure from scaring the wits out of me, and also from making me hurt in any way possible. (he and his mother killed my cat once) So here he is; 7 years in the grave, and he just won another round. Demolishing my relationship with her would have made him happy for a month. (just need to vent; this thing makes me so mad I can hardly describe it.)

I am sorry for that Julie. I dont have same circumstance but had a husband and sister tell lies and turn people against me. so i know what evil can detroy. it causes fear where there was love and it hurts. Ive tried to convince people that things arent the way it seems but ended up looking like i was trying to defend my own guilt somehow. guilt that i didnt have. i have lost countless people to this. or my being ashamed when i was fine. it wasnt even my misdead that was shameful. it was someone elses. I do understand this. especially in a small town for 44 yrs.

Thank you, freemenow; it really does help to have someone to talk to who has "been there and done that." Really frustrating, isn't it??

being a good person and surrounding my self with people who believe in me apart from the maddness away from the drama has helped so much! I try not to react. The crazy people love that. I dont need more guilt. Id like to not think badly and then all will be right in the world:) its a full time job. learning not to set the bar so high!

You're fine. Just cut yourself some more slack; don't be so hard on yourself. That's all part of their [censored], too. (you probably already knew that)

ya:) I knew that but thanks for reminding me! How are you sleeping these days? any better? Hope so:) I am crying way way less. the out of sight is more and more turning into the out of mind:) yay! Hugs!!!

Good deal!! (sorry for the censored comment; I didn't realized the word was in that category) I am still restless at night, but it's slowly improving I think. God is showing me more and more stuff these last few days.... Getting kind of interesting; and at times a little scary. But I can see the progress, thank God!! Sounds like you are definitely making some strides yourself!! Hugs to you, too. And keep your chin up!!