Hi, fortevila--
Basically, you want milk-free, ice-cream free, etc, dishes. Some lactose intolerants can eat aged cheese and yogurts, others cannot. If a recipe is labeled "Vegan", it would be OK for the lactose intolerant.
My daughter has great success with a product called Lact-aid (I'm sure there are other brands). You take a tablet with your dairy dishes and it provides the enzymes you need to digest the lactose. The lactose intolerance stems from a lack of sufficient amounts of this chemical in our own system. Milk with the lactaid already in it is also available.