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beckyM Offline OP
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I have five kids,three of my kids have learning disabilities.I home school four of my kids. My oldest has ADHD,bipolar,ODD, Verbal and cognitive disorders he also sufers from being a teen with raging hormons. My step daughter has not sever but not mild either Fetal Alchohol Syndrom,and some other learning disabilities.My youngest step daughter has a mild form of FAS and has some Asbergers and ADHD, and soon to be tested for dislexia. I also have two kids that have no disablities. Is it hard for others as well as it is for me? Am I nuts?

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Wow, Becky, you do have your daily challenges. Yes, it is harder raising kids that need more care and attention. I got through it one day at a time.

Does anyone else have any suggestions for Becky?

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Becky, just want to welcome you to the forum, we hope that you enjoy your stay!
Rosie


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Becky, I forgot to tell you I had 5 kids and several foster kids. I'm thinking about you.

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Hi Becky,

No, you are not nuts! Although we love all of our children those with any type of disability can be and usually are trying to say the very least. I raised two daughters and a son, the girls sailed through everything and it seemed their feet never touched the ground. My son struggled through school it seemed everything was a challenge even his friendships. Back in those days they called him a slow learner. I have since learned that he just learned differently than other children. I can also identify with homeschooling challenges. I never had the nerve to even try that but of course when my children were growing up it was heavily frowned upon. My daughter has been homeschooling my grandson for the past two years due to his diagnoses of Epilepsy a few years back. Believe me when I say that from watching her and trying to help her what little I could it takes a very strong Mom to homeschool a child/children. Through all the ups and downs, I think the best part is when your adult child tells you what a good Mom you were back then, how much they appreciate you believing in them and that they recognize you were always there for them right or wrong.

Your doing a great job Becky, otherwise you wouldn't be concerned. Keep up the good work and one day your children will tell you how much they appreciate everything you are doing for them right now.

Merry Christmas to you and your family, you all are in my prayers.

Debby


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Hi Becky, welcome to BellaOnline's forums!

I have a 17 yr old son w/ Asperger's and although academically he is very high functioning, his OCD component is very high, and his psych has also dx him with bipolar and ADHD as separate diagnoses. Typically these are not separate - because they are considere part of Asperger's, but his are so severe, his doc felt he needed the separate dx to adequately cover him for insurance, meds, and history.

He has been hospitalized 3 times. He has put ME in the ER twice.

Yes, it is hard. There are days that I feel like I wish I didn't have him. Then I feel horrid guilt for even thinking such a thing. This is my son. I love him, but I have such a hard time liking him sometimes, and there are times when I am downright scared of him.

I actually see a counselor myself. I need that extra support.

One thing my counselor said to me really caught me one day.

I was telling her about each of my 3 kids - the 17 yr old, my 11 yr old daughter (with ADD - no hyperactivity who is terribly withdrawn) and my 5 yr old ( no ADD, but extremely HYPER, and just a ball of energy).

She said, "It amazes me how you are able to handle parenting 3 such different children. You need a completely different set of parenting skills for each child! Not many people can do that."

And I think most of us with kids with learning disabilities are that way. We almost have to have "split personalities" when it comes to parenting. We can't treast our kids the same, we can't punish them the same, we can't encourage them the same. Is it any wonder we feel so frazzled all the time? We're being 2 or more Moms at one time!!!!

So don't be so hard on yourself. And know that you are definitely not alone, and that you can come here for fellowship, advice, or just to scream at the screen if you need to. wink


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So many people have kids with disabilities. The more people I talk to the more I hear stories. We must each take good care of ourselves so we have the energy to care for our families. That means eating properly, exercising, taking mini vacations away from home, like when the kids are in school.

Susan

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i love your quote in this post"Keep up the good work and one day your children will tell you how much they appreciate everything you are doing for them right now."

Last edited by gixmi; 07/22/09 12:24 PM.
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Hi Gixmi,

Welcome to the BellaOnline forums - I think you'll find a lot of support in any of the topics you visit! I agree that after kids are grown and have their own they appreciate their parents more!


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