BellaOnline Forums Family Siblings Advice on finding my brother?

Hi, does anyone have advice for finding family members in the UK? I've been trying to track down my father for a while and just before Christmas I found out I have a half brother - I'd be really interested in meeting him, but I'm getting no support from my Mother who seems to want the whole thing forgotten. I know my fathers full name, DOB, and identity number. My brothers first name, but his last could be one of two, maybe more...

Steven, you might check with Tina our geneaology editor. She might have some good ideas on how to track down family members.

Good luck with this!

Thanks Michelle - I will do. It's much harder than I was led to believe from TV and Film LOL. Very difficult, it was also a complete shock.

The Salvation Army finds family members. Contact your local SA and they should be able to help. Good Luck

Thanks rdyweur, I havn't contacted them about my brother, but I did contact them about my father a year ago, but my mother wasn't married to my father, even though they were together for years - and the Salvation Army seem to think that you don't count unless you're parents were married.
I was so upset to read this in the letter they sent me, it made everything worse. They say they don't contact people who weren't married in case of spoiling any new relationship that my father might be in - which I think is a digrace. I mean, he was the one that left - and now he gets the protection of his maybe 'new' family. Where's the fairness in that? He gets everything in other words, and we're left to pick up the pieces. Thanks though, it's a good idea, I might try them again about my brother, but all the info I have is on my father, I have very little on my brother - only his name and age, not even his birth date.

BTW, Michelle,
I did contact Tina, and she was very helpful at first, then she asked me for some more info and I havn't heard anything back for a while - do you think I should e-mail her again?

192.com is also a site for finding people ...have you heard or tried that one. (its a UK search site)

If you know the birth date and location of birth, they are public information, from there you can have a driving record sent to you from the motor vehicle department (also public info) and it should have a most recent address on it. I did this to find my brothers son when he turned 21. We felt it was his decision at that age to know us or not. Turned out he was trying to find us too but didn't know how. He was reunited with his dad 10 years ago and it was the best thing ever! Good luck.

Thanks guys, no, I havn't tried either of those - I'll check out 192.com in a bit

I'm hoping for a happy ending to all of this. I'm disappointed to hear the stand of the Salvation Army. In one sense I understand the idea of staying completely out of it without some idea of the circumstances of the child's birth. Being born during the marriage gives a better legal angle for them. The entire point may be to protect the organization. What I don't understand is the wording to a child trying to their parent. It certainly does send the message that one family is more important than the other.

Thanks Nina.
Yeah, I was really shocked and hurt when I read their letter, and there are so many different circumstances, you would think they would look, or try to look at each case differently. It does send the message out that an "illegitimate" child isn't as good as one born in marriage. I'm also surprised in this day and age, more attention hasn't been brought to changing the way they deal with the matter - after all, it's not the childs fault their parent's weren't married.

I'm waiting to see what they'll say about my brother - I'm really curious now, to know if he even knows I exist.

I would think this would be very important if only for health reasons - it can be critical to the child's health to know the parents' health histories.

I know I find it very frustrating, there could be a lot of things that I need to know health wise and don't. It's frustrating, and I heard back from the salvation army and they can't help me find my brother because I don't have his date of birth, although I have his age, mother's maiden name, last known address etc - so it's another door shut for me.