BellaOnline Forums Family Early Childhood premature infant development

I have a grandson who was born 6 weeks prematurely. He is now 13 weeks old. His "corrected age" is 7 weeks. He did not have any complications after birth. I am wondering if I should be concerned about his delayed development. He isn't really doing the things that a 7 week old "should" be doing. I realize all children develop at different stages but even looking at his corrected age he seems to be developmentally slow. I suppose he could be "slow" even with taking into consideration his corrected age because he was a preemie. I know that most preemies catch up by age 2. Does anyone have any experience with this?

I'd suggest going to babycenter.com for the week to week developmental descriptions. I think you'll see a lot of leeway and what you can do to help baby learn.

I'm carefully watching the timeline, too. My newest grandson was born October 17th and is 5 weeks, 3 days premature.

Thanks for the website. I'll definitely give it a look. Ours was born Oct. 23rd. How's yours doing?

Susan,
The website is awesome. Thank you so much for recommending it.

Yes, I like that site, too!

Babies have such different developmental curves, we spend a lot of time stressing ourselves out for nothing. First, I'd say that's it's sometimes hard to remember that the milestones are often later than we remember them to be. For a while, I was concerned that my almost 2-year old wasn't seeming to "get" colors, even though she could name shapes and even some letters and numbers. I worried because I wondered if there could be some colorblindness issues. But when I looked into it, the literature explained that colors were more conceptually difficult and were only a concern after THREE! Now at 2 yrs and 2 months she's totally got it and I was worried for nothing.

The time frames that actually constitute developmental delay, as opposed to normal variation, are generally WAY later than we think they would be, and pediatricians are on the watch for this stuff, especially for preemies.

I think something else worth pointing out is that grandparents need to stay sensitive to the fact that parents are already stressed and on top of this stuff, and that as tempting as it is to get into it, your job is simply to be encouraging and supportive. My first daughter was a slow weight gainer and infrequent pooper, and when older late to potty train. One set of grandparents were calling us constantly wanting to know what went on in pediatrician appts., what we were going to "do" about it, and constantly telling us she was not normal (which wasn't even right). They went so far as to tell my husband I was endangering our baby by breastfeeding her. Needless to say, they were wrong on all counts, but we were already stressed out enough over this stuff, had a great pediatrician and our relationship with those grandparents still suffers to this day. So I would gently encourage you to work out those worries with a friend, and not with your son and daughter -- with them, just be an ear to talk to about THEIR concerns... and if they aren't concerned, let it be. As long as they have appropriate professional guidance, trust it and trust them.

Please accept this in the spirit it was intended...as a parent who has been there, not as a "scolding." I think it's great when grandparents are really interested in their grandkids' lives and well-being, but it's hard (I imagine) to switch parenting mode off, and grandparenting mode on. :-)

Warmly,

Nicki :-)

I just had to pop in here - to reinforce the vast differences that children experience as they develop. While a preemie may be at greater risk for developmental delays, being born early does not ensure that they will be delayed. And, again - as Nicki said - the definition of delayed is so vast.

I have cousin (who is now 22 years old) who was born in the month of May. Her due date was in September. At the time of her birth, they told her parents she would not make it and they did "not do anything for her". But, in the morning she was still fighting so they flew her to Denver Children's Hospital (she was born in Boulder). They had to invent things to help her because they did not yet exist.

Today, she is an amazing woman with such great spirit. When people ask if anything is "wrong with her", I joke that she's not such a great speller.

Whenever I hear stories now of delays or premature births, I hold hope because I know that possibilities exist. They may be rare - as in my cousin's case - but they still exist!

I hope you are both able to enjoy watching the growth and development of your grandchildren with few worries!

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