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Amoeba
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Amoeba
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For a time I thought I wanted to re-marry - or at least find a serious relationship. But I had strong concerns about how a "new" person in my daughters' lives would effect them after being abandoned by their father.

Now they are practically grown and I have no desire to have anything outside of friendship. I have become "set in my ways" and I am perfectly content to do what I want, when I want. [Perhaps I need to go back to kindergarten and learn how to share all over again. Label me, "doesn't play well with others."] I plan to spend my empty nest days expanding my experiences in writing, taking care of my Caribbean felines, experimenting with new recipes and enjoying life. I don't need another person to do these things and when I want the company and shared laughter, that is what friends are for.

Cynthia Parker

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I was married for 17 years and while there were moments I could wish for independence, I really liked being part of a team. I've been separated/divorced now for 4 years and I enjoy my freedom, but I'm a romantic at heart and still hope for love and a lasting relationship. At the end of the day, the kids will find their own lives and leave home, and I would like to know that there is someone out there who looks forward to my phone call, wants to hear my voice, is interested in how my day went and in return,knows that I am there for him.


Shiny!
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Great Topic...

No, I don't want to get married again. Whats the point? Whats the up side? I have two little girls ages 9 and 6. Both of my girls would love for me to re-marry. My 6 year old more so since she was 2 when I divorced and I believe she longs for that "cinderella" storybook ending, a "Happily Ever After."

I do have a significant other in my life. I'm sure it's difficult for him to hear my "negative" views on the institution on marriage, but why get married? What is the point of changing my last name? or gosh forbid intermingling the finances again.
To me.. it still feels like "ownership" or a "Stamp" of approval. Pfffssst.. I'm 41 years old, I don't need approval from anyone at this point in my life or to legitimize my sex life.

I'm sure my "negative" views on the institution of marriage will most probably be the undoing of my current relationship. "Oh well." As other posters said..."been there done that". I love my freedom. I love my independence. I love being able to make choices for myself and my children. My "X" husband was not a help mate in anyway except financially. I held down a full time job and I kept the home ship afloat on my own, making it all happen. And yet... I had to bend to his rule and his whim's. And if I didn't he became an overgrown 2 year old throwing adult tantrums. No thank-you... I don't need to relearn that lesson either.

Joined: Oct 2005
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Amoeba
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Amoeba
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This is my 2nd marriage. If it ever fails I will not get married again. I loved being a single parent...it was difficult financially, but my boys and I made it through. There are certain things that I enjoy about marriage and a lot of things I don't. I think mostly I miss my independance and not being able to just go out and do whatever I want whenever I want.

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I didn't think I was ready to be married again and potentially go through the heartache all over again. I had set out in my mind how I would live my life with just my child. But I have since gotten married again and I couldn't be happier. It's odd how life throws monkey wrenches into your plans sometimes... sometimes very pleasant changes.


- Sifu Caroline
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Amoeba
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Amoeba
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I say the same thing ladies - this is my 2nd marriage -never thought id do it again -and if this doesn't work (and nothing in life is for sure) i will NOT get married again. Even though when i was struggling as a single parent after my divorce - i truly believe the kids learned from that - and it made us stronger - love each other more. They knew i struggled - and how far ive come etc. and they're proud of me. I think sometimes the idea of being along scares us - but being unhappy is far more damaging. Believe me - i know. I think my first marriage was unhappy for so long that i got used to it...

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Hey all!!
I've been married twice and oddly enough each marriage lasted 5 years. I have a 23 yr old from my first marriage, he is out of the house now but I do have a 16 and 12 from my second living with me. I think at times that I don't want to get married again and that the kids and I love just picking up and going on a quick vacation when we feel like it without having to get another opinion (their dad lives 400 miles away). But there are times when it would be nice to have someone to talk to and do the "adult" things with (movies and dinner, LOL), then there are times I like falling asleep with my books and such around me on the bed. I guess, I'm just confused.


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