BellaOnline Forums Religion and Spirituality Dreams Shamanistic dream? Love?

The day before yesterday I dreamt:

I was going with a young man to a place (his place). There were two large, large swimmingpools (mixtures of swimming pools and the open sea in fact - or swimming pools which lead into the open sea.
I had the impression maybe it's not allowed to go into this water - but nevertheless I did. The water was completely clean, pure, all polluting elements were taken out of it. It felt so good to swim in this water... It was salt water, and swimming in it was like swimming in the Dead Sea (you always stay on the surface).
When I had crossed the first swimming pool, and reached the border of thesecond one, I got kind of a bad conscience, turned my head and asked the young man whether it was allowed to swim there. - He said yes.

Later I left that place with the father of the young man, I did not want to sta with the young man, I prefered the prsence of the old one (which theyoung man did not like, he looked -- gloomy? jealous? not content).
The old man cared for a species of insects which looked like a mixture of beetles and roaches. He called them roaches.
At the end, we (me and the old man) were laying together (NOT sleeping together) on a bed or couch. I lay in his arms, feeling very, very comfortable, it was peaceful, secure, beautiful, loving, harmonious. But I always had the feeling I had to leave (I don't know why).
He said (taking the feelings/thoughts out of my head it seems): "You don't want to leave today." - No, I didn't want to leave that day. - He said: "You don't want to leave tomorrow." - No, I didn't want to leave the next day. - I didn't want to leave AT ALL.

I got this kind of feelings for a man from the neighborhood, he is much younger, I am afraid to talk to him.

I wrote him a short letter one week ago, he did not show any reaction yet. I am very sad.

I think I know him (the man from my neighborhood) from a former life, and we loved each other, which makes it so important to me. - But as it seems, we both have different paths to go, and we'll not share our lives.

What did the letter say? Can you share?

How much younger is he?

Can't you just say hi?

Yes, I can share. But I have to tell the story from the beginning.

I am currently living in Germany, and about two months ago I moved from Nuremberg to Berlin. In front of the block (which has four entrances) I saw a motorycle, apparently from the army, with a sidecar for luggage. On the sidecar there was a symbol/sign unknown to me: a diagonal cross with a circle around it, and a "T" at the upper left beam of the cross. I found the motorcycle interesting, but I asked myself who might be the owner, and whether he might be a dangerous militarist.
One day I saw him. He looked pretty harmless, beautiful eyes - even though he is driving around on his motorcycle with a steel helmet and military trousers and parka.
He is not only harmless, but also friendly. He was greeting me (by bowing his head very respectful) passing by on his motorcycle. So he cannot be a racist, I thought, for I don't look "aryan" at all (somewhere in the Native American forum there is a photo of me).
Three weeks ago I realized that I like him very much. But I did not meet him any more nor did I know his name. - So I decided to tape a short letter on his motorcycle.
I asked him what was the meaning of the symbol on his motorcycle, and told him that I am interested in runes and several religions.
I told him that I have been interested in the meaning of this symbol since I first saw it, just had been too shy to ask.

Well, he lives with a man - maybe just a friend, maybe more (maybe his partner, maybe he is gay, I don't know).

He may be ten years younger, maybe even more.

I haven't met him for weeks. So I cannot say hi. - I thinkI'd not say hi but: "Well, it seems that was thewrong letter", or something like this.

I thought maybe it's a right-wing extremist symbol or a sbol used in neopaganism, and maybe he doesn't react because he is afraid to tell me so. But it is not, a friend told me now - it is a sign used by the German Wehrmacht.

Why do you think your letter was wrong?

I do think he's wrong for you because he's ten years younger.

I don't think it's because of his age.

I've got the impression his way of life is much too different from mine.

Yes, I think you are right! Are you okay with that now?

Not completely - but I'm feeling much better.

I am happy to hear that. Each day will get better.

I am still asking myself: what was the meaning of my dream - the water was so pure, so wonderful; and laying in the arms of the old shaman (who has purified the water - it was his work, this water in a world of pollution) was so wonderful too. Such a sense of beauty, light, peace and harmony.

I met the motorcyclist on sunday - we talked. Next day I met him again. There is such a feeling of closeness. (I described this in the Native American forum: Strange experience),