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I sat on my patio a few evenings ago and listened to two little neighbor kids, about 7-8 years old having so much fun out on the back lawn searching for those tiny tree frogs. At first I thought "how cute - typical little boys" - then I realized that they were killing the frogs by smashing them with rocks. I was so shocked and angry! I peeked over my patio railing and told them to please not kill the frogs and the boys ran back home, seemingly embarrassed or afraid that they had been caught.
My concern in any such situation like this is: is this a matter to be overly concerned about? Is this how serial killers started out their lives? Am I for sure jumping too far ahead? Do I even need to be concerned about this type of behaviour in kids I do not even know? Does this belong in another thread?
I am still upset about this. Those little frogs are so cute and totally harmless.
Last edited by Phyllis, BellaEd; 09/04/08 02:17 PM.
Walk in Peace and Harmony. Phyllis Doyle Burns Avatar: Fair Helena by Rackham, Public Domain
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BellaOnline Editor Chimpanzee
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BellaOnline Editor Chimpanzee
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Phyllis,
I would let the boys parents know about their behavior.
Any child that actively goes out looking for something to kill - that is a sign of a problem. Even if it had been a spider; if they had been looking for them to kill, searching them out; as opposed to just coming up on one and knee-jerk reaction stepping on it - I think that is a big difference.
It is the matter of intent. And these boys had the intent to kill a living being.
That is disturbing behavior that needs to be addressed before they move up to kittens and eventually people.
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Those are exactly my fears, Michelle. Thanks. I will speak to the parents to let them know my concern and how disturbed I was. I do not think I should say anything like "this is a sign of a possible serial killer", though (which is exactly my thoughts but not what the parent would want to hear me say). I will be subtle and let them know it is a disturbing thing to have witnessed and my concern is for the boys and their attitude towards living creatures. Thanks, again.
Last edited by Phyllis, BellaEd; 09/04/08 03:13 PM.
Walk in Peace and Harmony. Phyllis Doyle Burns Avatar: Fair Helena by Rackham, Public Domain
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Gecko
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Gecko
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I agree - I would mention it to the parents.
Let me put it this way - if it were MY son I would DEFINATELY want to know!
Angela England
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BellaOnline Editor Gecko
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I don't really think they are future serial killers... I think this is more common than we realize, but definitely something that the parents should know about. I personally don't think it means the boys have some inner problem or are in some way evil -- I think kids deal with issues of death and control in odd ways sometimes, and unless someone discussed with them, they won't have thought it out in the same way we might. There are also issues with relativism that aren't clear to kids. For example, I kill bugs and spiders in front of my kids all the time without much thought. How are they to know that frogs are in some sort of different category. We eat meat, which my daughter knows full well involves killing chickens and cows and pigs, etc. Asking them questions of "why did you want to kill the frogs" and "how did it feel to kill the frogs" and "what do you think that was like for the frogs." If they can discover the motivation, they can redirect it in a more appropriate way. For all we know, they just heard about someone's older sibling doing a dissection and are curious about what's inside a frog, which some might consider scientific initiative. Nicki
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BellaOnline Editor Wolf
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BellaOnline Editor Wolf
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I think its just kids being mean. A lot of kids do mean things like that. Some turn out fine and others turn to be Jeffrey Dahmers and John Gacys.The parents should know and they may or may not care. I know I was a mean kid like that and I turned out fine. Never mind Chelle. lol.
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I think its just kids being mean. A lot of kids do mean things like that. Some turn out fine and others turn to be Jeffrey Dahmers and John Gacys.The parents should know and they may or may not care. I know I was a mean kid like that and I turned out fine. Never mind Chelle. lol. Well - all righty then!
Walk in Peace and Harmony. Phyllis Doyle Burns Avatar: Fair Helena by Rackham, Public Domain
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Chipmunk
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Chipmunk
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I will admit that my little brother and I hunted down leopard frogs and giant toads...only to build them terrariums in his radio flyer much to my mother's disgust.
I would want to know if they were my kids too. (so I could give them a serious tongue lashing)
Last edited by Wendy Tall One; 09/05/08 10:33 PM.
per aspera ad astra: Through rough ways to the stars...
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I mentioned it to the mother and she was as upset as I was. She spoke to the boys about it and I have not seen them looking for frogs since. I realize what boys are like and how curious they are and how they love to explore - I grew up with four brothers, raised one son who had numerous friends I always seemed to end up with in my house and am helping to raise my grandson and my home is still filled with boys everyday. I simply told the mother that I was upset and that the boys should realize that the frogs are harmless and probably eat all the mosquitos that can be harmful to us.
I remember when I was quite little, my eldest brother captured a giant bullfrog, "Alfred", and kept him in the yard for one summer. Alfred had disappeared that fall and we were upset. My Father explained that the frog went below ground for the winter. He got very upset with us when we started digging up the gardens, looking for Alfred to bring him in the warm house. We never saw Alfred again, since we moved late that winter to another part of town.
Walk in Peace and Harmony. Phyllis Doyle Burns Avatar: Fair Helena by Rackham, Public Domain
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BellaOnline Editor Parakeet
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BellaOnline Editor Parakeet
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While I certainly understand your distress, Phyllis, I think there is a slight difference between killing frogs and killing mammals, at least in the minds of boys. Not saying there is to me, but I think it might be more common for young boys to do that sort of thing with frogs and toads, than say, with kittens or puppies. Those are the kids that really need to be helped!
And I truly understand your feelings, I used to love to catch frogs as a kid, but only to enjoy them, not hurt them.
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