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I do not know how to handle this anymore - I am at my wit's end and ready to explode!!! My daughter, grandson and I live in a duplex in an apartment complex. Our neighbor moved in 2 months after we did. Our front doors are about 18" apart and at the end of a common area entry hall. The neighbor informed us when they were moving in that she would be running a "day care center". We were shocked and told her there are rules in apartment complex's and running a business from your apartment is not allowed. She said she had "cleared it with the manager". We spoke with the management, (who knew nothing about that at the time )told them we did not want to live next to a "day care center", the reason we got a single story duplex was to have a little more quiet and a lot less neighbors so close to us. The manager explained that they had to change the neighbor's lease and that she would only be "babysitting" and was told she could not ever have more than three children there at a time. Well she now has 4, and the cars and people are coming in and out at all times during the day from 6:30 AM till after 5PM, parking crooked and taking up two spaces and my daughter often cannot park in front of our apartment because of these people taking up spaces. (my daughter has been on crutches due to a knee surgery). Once I had to ask one of my neighbors clients to please not take up two spaces when she comes here and she apologized, said she did not realized she had done that - well, she was parked so crooked I do not know how she could not have noticed. This morning I had to ask another lady, at 6:30AM to please not slam the neighbor's door when she comes in and out.

Just a little while ago, my neighbor comes over and starts yelling at me for "yelling at her clients" and told me I had no right to talk to her clients at all and that I was to come to her if I had a complaint about her clients. I told her this is my home and I have a right to ask people to stop something if they are annoying us and waking up my grandson so early in the mornings, every morning and taking up more than one parking space. My neighbor informed me that this is "her business, her clients and I am not to upset them".

How would you handle this? This is not a place of business, but a residence and my neighbor expects us to conform to her business rules so as "not to upset her clients". I am really so upset right now I am shaking. I do not even trust myself to go to the office and complain about this for fear of losing my temper and making an idiot out of myself!!!

Last edited by Phyllis, NatAmEd; 06/18/08 09:31 PM.

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Phyllis Doyle Burns
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There have been many other annoyances besides the ones I mentioned above. The second week they were here they had stored in the common enty hall a lot of junk from their storage that the neighbor herself told me was full of rat droppings and hair. I asked them to move it out immediately due to the possibility of disease. (Look up on the internet what diseases rate droppings can spread.)

They had put tons of outdoor toys, slides, gym stuff, etc in the front yard for the day care center and had to be told by management to move it.

They often snap at my grandson and his friends to be quiet when going in and outside because the kids she are watching are taking naps.

I am so sick of these people! We do not have the peace of a relaxing home, but are living next to trashy and rude people. I hate it!!!


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Smudge her.

Just kidding. Well, not really.
If I were in your shoes, my husband would advise me to wait until I cooled down before doing anything. I tend to speak my mind and, often, it can be spoken more appropriately when I am calm.

You have already tried to approach your neighbor. You may want to approach her one more time stating that this is a problem between the two of you and you would like to resolve it with her (I'm guessing she wouldn't be open to that). Remain calm no matter what.

If she's not able to resolve the situation with you - I'd approach management again. It sounds like the rules have changed. Find out what the current rules are - how they feel about the "babysitting" going on from early morning until evening, if there are any noise rules she should be adhering to and what parking rules can be enforced.

Smudge yourself before (and after) you approach her or management. smile Stay calm and state your situation as best you can (that would be my problem - not getting heated and over-passioned).

I hope it works out! What a terrible situation to be in. yuck.


Lisa Pinkus

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You are right, Lisa. I do need to smudge myself before I take any action in order to calm down and get rid of the negativity around here. I wish I could smudge her! I will wait till morning before I decide how to handle this. My main point is that this is a residence, our home, and that we should not have to conform to the requests/requirements of a business operation that my neighbor decides to run from an apartment.

Last edited by Phyllis, NatAmEd; 06/18/08 09:54 PM.

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Call the local zoning board and see if the duplex is zoned to run a business out of. Call the local social services department and have them come out to see if there is enough room and such to do babysitting. Also, tell them that there is a lot of crying and yelling going on and they will come out to check things out

Tell your neighbor that if the parking situation doesn't change, then you will have a policeman out there in the morning to make sure they are properly parked.

Make a complaint with the management office every single day until things change and if they are still being rude and obnoxious, make sure that your son and his friends make plenty of noise in the early afternoon everyday and when your neighbor tells them to quiet down just politely tell her that they are your son's friends and she has no business telling your son and his friends what to do. Just like she does to you about her clients and the parking deal. lol.



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I hope it's resolved soon, Phyllis.

I like Lance's suggestions!



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Wow, Vance! Could you just come over here and stay till we have this resolved? They will not keep up this kind of .... for long if you were here!!!

Thanks for the tips. I will call these places - without giving my name or the apt complex name yet unless things get out of hand.

It did not occur to me that she feels she has the right to yell at my grandson's friends yet I have no right to speak with her "clients". MMMMM...something is not quite couth about that.


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Phyllis Doyle Burns
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Yes most definitely I would get a notebook and start keeping a log. Document everything. Then go to management and prove that she is doing something illegal. Make sure you notify the town hall and everybody too. This is not something that should be done in a shared building. She is taking advantage of you and the situation and it is doubtful she is going to give up her "illegal income" unless forced to.


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Thanks, Lisa! I will get out a notebook and start documenting. I really appreciate all of you guys and your tips and support - you are great!!! smile


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Hmmm.....don't day care places need business licenses? I know that they do in my State. I'd check to see if she has one.



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