Hello daters, both new and veteran:

For those of you who don't know already, I am the new dating editor for BellaOnline. I am very excited to be here and am looking to share many thoughts and laughs with you.

I am very interested to know where you go to find potential dates? Do you sit at home and wait for a date to leap from the pages of your romance novel or do you actively strap on your boots and trudge through the thick wading pool of prospects awaiting discovery outside of your home? Where do you go? What types of places have you been most successful in finding a hook-up? I'm all ears and eyes.

I' am agoraphobic and don,t leave my house, I met my girlfriend in my back yard she lived next door and was out back raking leaves, what are the chances of that happening again?

This reminds me of that new show October Road. One of the characters is a shut-in. He met his girlfriend when she delivered him a pizza. So, meeting someone at home can be done but your chances are much greater if you are able to get out. I suggest seeking professional help to deal with overcoming the agoraphobia. You can miss out on a whole lot of living by limiting your world to only one location.

Thanks Niquenya; i am in therapy.have been since 1974, And on many meds over the years. maybe i should order pizza lol (just kidding)

I usually meet people through friends, and from work.

I'm sorry to hear you don't get out much, skyhaven. I've had several friends who have had that problem, and one male friend now. Funny how we tend to think it only happens with women, but it doesn't.

I have heard professional hypnotism can be very helpful as a supplement to therapy in getting over a phobia. They don't force you to leave your safe space, rather they help you to make that safe space larger, and they help you to feel more relaxed, safe, and confident. Does that sound like something interesting to you? Your therapist could probably tell you more about it.

hi Niquenia,

I don't really know of good ways to meet guys today. I tried two different online dating services, but that turned out to be even less successful than sitting at home reading a romance novel, LOL.

Before being anxious to meet people, I highly recommend doing some self-analyzation to figure out what makes you happy and getting some hobbies/activities you can call your own.

This can be a real process. But only in figuring out yourself first can you be truly open to meeting other people.

What do you like that you've never tried? What activities did you used to like that you haven't done in awhile?

Once you've made a short list of "you," start the adventure of finding kindred spirits. It was only after I realized I hadn't been scuba diving in three years when I made it a point to meet other divers so I could dive and travel -- two of my passions I'd been neglecting! I found a local dive shop, signed up for a trip, went to their advertised happy hour, and met a bunch of people with whom I now regularly socialize. I might add that the very night I reached out to that group at a happy hour, I met the man I've been dating for 10 months. I almost didn't go because the drive was hell, and I would have been more comfortable just going home to veg. Thank God I didn't!

Just at the gym today, where I went to go practice my racquetball shots, I met three people with whom I could socialize if I got their numbers/e-mail addresses.

Find yourself first, then don't be afraid to put feelers out. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. So go for it! What do you have to lose?

Great advice Angela! I absolutely agree. The best relationships are formed when you are not actually looking for them. It is best to focus on knowing who you are and what your unique talents, needs and desires are. Work on honing your skills and actively seek out what is important to you. When you are living a life you love by doing the things that you enjoy, relationships come easy. Something about your spirit being aligned with your passions invites kindred souls.

Happy Living!

I meet my boyfriend during my visit in Bank.