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I remember walking at the zoo with my nephews, nieces and my own children when they were very little. Because they were close to the same age they looked like stair steps- a total of six. A lady passed by me and said to the person she was with, "She has too many kids" What??? (I admit I thought it was funny but at the same time I thought 'How dare she?')I brought this up to a friend who agreed in her own way. She didn't believe a mother could take proper care of children so close in age, not financially but emotionally. "The baby barely has time to be the baby before they have to make room for the next one. They miss out on the real nurturing experience which could mean emotional problems" hmmmm - anyone?

Last edited by Nina - Siblings; 03/04/08 12:34 PM.

Nina Guilbeau
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This is a tough question because every person will always justify the number of kids they have and say it is right. Very few people will say that their family situation is "bad for their kids".

What if you look at it differently to try to make it objective. If you had the ideal after-school situation for your child to learn, would it be a private tutor who focused just on your child to help them learn? Would it be a teacher with a bunch of different kids of different ages, moving amongst them and helping each with different tasks?

Many studies show the eldest child is usually the smartest because the parents were spending one-on-one time with that child, and focusing only on his needs, up until the others came along. The second and third children never got that single focus.

Babies really benefit from one-on-one time with their mother, the more hours the better ...


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I believe every mother, or at least every "good, healthy mother" knows how many kids she can handle. And I don't think there's such a thing as too many. I've studied families with over ten children, and it's true, there's not much time to devote to a single child, but there's more to life than that. Children learn social skills like no one else. And it's just amazing the many things they learn that cannot be taught at schools. Everyone sees this from a different angle and there's endless opinions on the subject, and while those opinions may all be true, the one thing we should agree on is that we should all respect other women's choices. Each one of us has her own defenition of success and happiness, and that's what we follow. Someone else's recipe might not work for us.


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