BellaOnline Forums Family 12 Step Recovery Compulsive Gambling

In society today, the Compulsive Gambler is the "Modern Day Leper"

The Pathological Gambler has become "marginalized" and "oppressed" based on their "shame-based illness"

The "Stigma" attached to Compulsive Gambling is far reaching and abbhorent.

The Gambler is in Denial
The Gambler's Family is in Denial
The Gambler's Friends are in Denial
The Gambler's Employer is in Denial
The Insurance industry is in Denial
The Criminal Justice system is in Denial
The Clergy are in Denial
The Social Service Agencies are in Denial
The Alcohol/Drug Counselors are in Denial

EVERYONE in modern society is in Denial about this illness

A combination of an Addiction & "Impulse Control Disorder" [see section 312.31 DSM-IV American Psychiatric Association]

If Denial were a "brick wall," then "Truth" represents the "wrecking ball" to break down this lie.

Anybody out there identify?

1xbettor

1xbettor,

The same could be said of every addiction out there. And, in society today, I think women are still even more stigmatized for their addiction than men. Denial is prevalent in all areas but the most important person to deal with the addiction is the addict himself/herself. Personally, I had to face it because everyone else, well-meaning, enabled me and I loved it! Thanks for writing.

Kathy L.

Does anyone have any advice on how to handle addictive gambling by a family member? We recently discovered someone in our family has had this problem for several years and has spent thousands of dollars, which his young family really needs. Now they are saddled with a huge debt to pay off and we just don't know if he can quit on his own.

Where is the best place for he and his spouse to get help?

Joanj, Well, the good news is he can quit gambling and the not-so-good news is that he probably cannot do it on his own. If his gambling is truly an addiction, he needs help no matter how he promises or tries to convince anyone he can do it on his own. Ask any person who has an addiction and I am sure that they will agree with me. Gamblers Anonymous (GA) follows the same steps as AA or NA. The only difference is the actual addiction we admit to. Look in your local area for meetings for this person (if he will go) but it is the family that also needs help to cope with all of this. Al-Anon is great for families who have alcohol/drug addicted family members and I am not sure about gambling but it would be a good idea to call them also for some help and guidance. The family should NOT act like his gambling is not a problem as this is only enabling. The most important element is for the person to admit he has a problem and if he cannot, then you hope he will get help because his family is giving him no choice. Keep in touch and let me know how they are doing. You can also write me on my bellaonline email in 12 Step Recovery. Thanks for writing and perhaps some of the other readers can also give you some help.

Kathy L.