We enjoy it, we want it, and sometimes we are surprised that time passes without it, so...

exactly how important is a healthy sex life to a marriage and why?

Personally, when I was married, I wanted to have sex 3-4 times a week. My husband wanted it less and that was a problem for us, well me. Keep in mind that at the time I was the one working full time supporting the family. He was home doing the wifely duties.

Interesting! Sort of a role reversal. In my couples coaching I have found a great many women seem to want sex more often than their husbands.

In my opinion sex is a great glue.

I need sex everyday and so does my husband.

I totally get what you mean. I feel a healthy sex life is extrmemly important to a marriage. I think it really keeps the couple close

Yes. That's right.

Coming from a man's point of view, I beg to differ. My wife has ZERO interest in sex. Very strange becasue she is a Scorpio and they are suppose to extremely active. She has had three kids from a previous marriage and she said becasue she thought she was doing her role as a wife. But with me it is totally nothing. Sex is a very big thing to me, my mine goal is to please the woman first; she doesn't even care. I am the second man she has ever been with, according to her; and I have many, many years experience. But still nothing; candles, massages, romantic music, sending the kids away for the weekend, going on a cruise, even going to Vegas....nothing. I need my sex!

Please take this in the helpful way I mean it rather then being mean spirited. I often speak with women about their feelings about sex and I hear this alot. I have always wondered if there is not a real reason for this, like were they harmed physically by someone and intimacy becomes difficult for them, is their a psychological programming that took hold, when I was growing up, my Mother was a sexually frigid woman and she did her best to raise me that way, it worked with my sister but NOT with me. I have also wondered if something hormonal could be off with these women. Hormones drive our sexual drives, if they are out of balance this could account for a low sex drive.

First let me say that I am divorced and been on my own for 5 years now but I have to say that I couldn't remain in a relationship where my lover witheld sex from me.

When you say its a good glue, that is so true. When my lover is making love to me, he can leave the seat up on the toilet, the cap off the tooth paste, just about anything it I don't notice. But withold sex from me and I get unhappy about alot of things. Sex smoothes over the rough edges. It brings a level of intimacy to a relationship that just can't be gained any other way. Even if I met a man that had everything else I wanted but was not sexually compatible, I could not have a lasting reltionship with him.

When I was married, I used to masturbate in the shower every morning before work. I felt I needed the release. He knew about it and didn't care. I have spoken with men about it and many have said they would be embarassed if their wife felt like she had to masturbate.

I am a man and I think intimacy is very important in a marriage my body aches with unfulfilled passion and desire. my wife however does not share those feelings, no matter how much I try to gain her interest or to please her, sex to her is as work, It is as though she shuts down on me, when I try to talk to her about it, she side steps the the issue and starts a fight with me just to get off the subject, she can go months, contently without having intimacy with me I have been married 27 years I'm 50 years of age I have all my hair and teeth I don't think I am a bad looking guy, I work out regularly,I mean its not like I am a Troll or any thing, I can even be a gentlemen, sometimes I feel attracted to other women I think sometimes there attracted to me, but I once vowed for better or for worse, I will never cheat or stray, I guess the worse is all I have.