BellaOnline Forums Relationships Relationships Cheating?

I totally agree with u mindy, and for the person who said, quote
"He is missing what your not providing" well many women are not into anus sex if that should b one of his preferences, amoung other things

First of all I dont have a problem with gay sex...i'm totally cool with it...but think about it from a perspective of a straight couple and the man is all hot and heavy with male on male action (cuz female on female is the rage among men). He obviously is needing something that his WOMAN cant provide. And I'm not trying to "lump it with pedophiles", but to make everyone happy...porn can be classified as pedophilish, screwing dead people, animals, same sex, gang bang, interracial, etc etc etc. I agree that it depends on the couple but someone is asking if it cheating and when a guy is spanking the monkey to porn instead of partner be it man or woman then there is a problem. It's like indulging in something a little too much. And we should all be aware that when you are getting off that way your body becomes dependent on that and it becomes more difficult to get stimulated via other ways. Secondly...ok if a guy is into anal BUT if he's obsessing over anal sex porn, that is not going to convince his wife even more to do it nor will he get the same feeling by watching it.

Cheating (in my book) must involve some form of interaction. Breeches of trust are any actions which go outside the parameters of what is considered acceptable within the relationship. Those will vary widely. Every relationship is different and has different "rules."

I do not disagree with the references to mental illness regarding issues like pedophilia and obsessive/constant viewing of porn. But being mentally ill is a different issue from cheating, even in the context of porn, isn't it?

Thanks.

Well at exactly what point do you go from enjoying porn, REALLY enjoying porn to being mentally obsessed with it? I mean how does the person on the outside know? Scenario...you get on your home computer and you see a whole bunch of porn history on it....do you know if that has been viewed in a short period of time or over months? How can you tell? (I mean I can tell but to someone who is not very computer literate...)If your spouse likes you dressing up as a school girl ok...but when he wants you to call him daddy??? Ok thats just weird. Some people like role play...God knows I do but if my husband was looking at what we do in our role play online or on videos and masterbating...then thats outside of our "contract" of role playing. Its no longer something between us.

Will a man not get excited watching porn?

Well it depends...if he is watching it to get excited yes, but I think that if he ran across it but wasnt into it he will see it and move on with no problem. My exhusband thought it was disgusting.

You think that a man can watch porn and move on without getting excited? Is that in his control?

Yes, if somebody finds porn disgusting, it will not excite him. Right?

Obviously.