One other suggestion is based on my experience with my kids and in the classroom.
I'm a firm believer that most misbehaviors are signs of unmet needs.
Now I'm not saying you're not meeting your children's needs!! LOL The point is that children will act in ways we don't think are acceptable when they're tired, hungry, frustrated, bored, etc...So you can OFTEN eliminate the behavior if you get to the source of the problem.
For example, I find that my kids need lots of FLOOR TIME with mommy in the morning. You know, when I interact with them BEFORE I try to get any housework done, etc..They need that time with mommy and then they're able to play together and let me get some stuff done. When I used to get up start doing X, Y, and Z first, I ended up with attention-getting behavior being exhibited.
Also, my kids are both extroverts so we get out of the house in the morning and then are home for quiet afternoons. My son needs to get outdoors once a day (as does my daughter) and I see more behavior issues when I skip that due to rain, lack of time, etc...
We also try to set them up for success by going to the grocery store or a restaurant when they are WELL-RESTED.
In other words, try to turn your way of thinking around so you're not focused on being reactive and being PROACTIVE instead.
Hope this rambling helps a bit! And I'm certainly not saying that they're sometimes just difficult, but more than 15 years of experience with young children in many different contexts has taught me that 95% of the time there's a need that's not being met at that particular moment...
Jan
Thank you Dr.Gwenn! I do feel guilty when I put him in his room.
I feel like he is spending most of his life in there these days and it will scar him forever ;( But it does seem to give him an opportunity to regain control of his emotions and his little body. And it gives me a chance to take a deep breath before talking to him AGAIN about the behavior.