A very interesting topic and I can fully respect the
views on both sides of the debate. However, the issue
runs far deeper than just 'beauty', 'envy', 'jealousy' or 'race'.
As I see it, the real issue is more to do with taking
personal responsibility for ourselves. That is, how we
perceive. At a very early stage in our lives, our values
are shaped by our families, our environment and by the
quality of our interactions with our wider social networks.
These values play a significant role in our
later lives and will largely influence our belief systems
as well as our attitudes.
The lady in question appear to demonstrate values and a
belief system that has shaped her perception of blond
hair, blue eyes, refined facial features and fit body
being the the more highly desirable characteristics in
a woman.
Excuse me for pointing out that if this was not an
issue, she would most certainly not have referred to
herself first and foremost, using a stereotypical
body image type. This is not being judgmental of
her, because I fully understand the enormous media
pressures on women of all races, to conform to what
is perhaps a male-driven media or cultural image of
what constitute the perfect woman of beauty.
Do also consider this scenario. Powerful media and
other images have long since portrayed Jesus Christ
as a White man with blond hair, blue eyes and white
skin. This has been readily accepted by the Church.
But was he White or a Jewish man? Or was this
rebranding of a holy man supposed to make him more
acceptable to Western societies? Whether Black or
White, we have all worshipped or have been exposed
to these images depicting this holy man as being
White.
This is only one example of the many stereotypical
attitudes and behaviours we, the human race, engage
in and/or condone as the norm. Is it little wonder
that some women have internalised this image as that
which is valued above all else?
If a white congregation went to church to be
confronted by a black image of Jesus Christ, this
would most certainly provoke a reaction. Why?
Because it would go against grain and against what
is considered acceptable.
So, to the lady with the sensitive question, is it
possible that your ingrained values, beliefs,
perceptions and attitudes, which have been shaped
by your significant networks, really the underlying
issue you need to address and resolve for yourself?
If you carry beliefs and attitudes that are deeply
ingrained, on a conscious or subconscious level you
will most certainly project them onto other people.
This may well provoke reactions not dis-similar to
those you described and especially from women who are
being sent daily messages that what you represent is
better. This would then mean that you are being
incongruent - you say you are this way, but your
actions say something else.
Speaking as a Black Caribbean woman, my Black sisters
carry far more weight and have a fuller figure than
White women. Yet despite this, research shows that
Black women as a race, are very positive about their
looks and hold a far healthier body-image esteem.
The latter of which I personally find worrying for
the obvious health implication reasons.
As far as I'm concerned, the issue you raise is not
one of 'jealousy', 'envy' 'beauty' or 'race',
although it does point to a need for each and every
one of us, irrespective of race or colour, to take
personal responsibility for what we think, how we
think and why we think the way we do. Perhaps more
importantly, to put more of our efforts into changing
ourselves for the better so we can lead rich and
meaningful lives.
At the end of the day, we're all made of flesh, blood
and bones but we don't all need to carry the same
attitudes.
P.S This is my very first post so I do hope I have
kept within positing guidelines and forum rules.
http://www.health-womens-healthy-living-goals.com/black-health-womens.htmlblack-health-womens.html
