BellaOnline Forums Family Child Abuse Rediscovering your lost childhood

I just got through reading Kelli Deister's article The Inner Child

Though she technically writes for the Child Abuse Site, I thought this was a wonderful article that everyone on this board needed to read.

In my opinion, probably the very first thing we should all do is the thing we were punished for doing as a child, or not allowed to do as a child. I think those missing pieces are sometimes the most painful - the squealing laughter, getting messy, you know - the things our kids do that drive us crazy now, but we roll our eyes and let them play because they're kids!

Anytime I go out and do something supremely silly, and another adult looks at me like I'm just nuts; at first I'll feel self-concious, then I'll think "heck, I'm having fun. He looks like he has a hemorrhoid!" - And then I crack up laughing all over again. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Michelle, what a wonderful post. Thank you.

Kids should get messy because it build there immunaty if babies and tots stay sanitary all the time the wont build a natural immunity to the world of germs at large!!!

Very true.

<img src="/images/graemlins/queen.gif" alt="" /> I am a believer in the medicinal use of blowing great big gorgeous bubbles.

<img src="/images/graemlins/music.gif" alt="" /> About 5 yrs ago, after she had had some health issues, I bought my mom a huge bottle of bubbles and made her a large beaded bubble blowing wand - with lots of fancy ribbons, plastic 'jewels' and glitter. (it looks like a Grandma-Sized Fairy Wand - with a bubble loop instead of a star on the end.) <img src="/images/graemlins/music.gif" alt="" />

She takes the thing with her on road trips - and in traffic jams - where she used to stress herself to bits, she unrolls all the windows (including the sunroof) and blows bubbles.
She tells me that the people around her always start to laugh....

<img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" /> Its never too late to giggle. <img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" />

ps....I never knew she had never been allowed to blow bubbles as a child....

That is wonderful!

It must be very hard to engage in "road rage" when you see big bubbles floating by! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

For me, it wasn't so much what I wasn't allowed to do. It was more what I missed by growing up too fast because of my environment. I find myself wanting to be nurtured and instead being attracted to those who need nurturing themselves. I am looking for a safe place to unwind and chat, but so far have found no online resources to talk. I hate posting and waiting for responses. I need interaction with likeminded others. Any suggestions?

labor_of_love,

I can understand your need to be nurtured, since that is something I have wanted for myself as well. In my personal journey, I feel as though I should first begin to learn how to nurture that inner child inside of me that longs to be nurtured. I am not sure what kinds of sites are out there in regards to what you are seeking, but I'll keep my eyes open. I'm so glad you came to the forum. Thank you for taking the time to post how you feel.

Artglam,

I had to chuckle at the thought of blowing bubbles in traffic. I personally discovered my love for blowing bubbles about six months ago. One night, when I was feeling really discouraged, I went onto the porch and began to blow bubbles. It was just like being a kid again. I highly recommend blowing bubbles to de-stress.

i consider myself a survivor of child abuse ,,but it wasn't until i was well into my 40's that i confronted it and my mother and the pain i had gone through as a child with a uncaring cruel step father ...is strange we blame ourselves for all that happens to us ,,such as 'if i had been a better child,,or maybe if i was prettier,,or smarter,,etc ,,etc,, etc",,i carried guilt with me for years and still do at times but its easier now and i have had a loving husband of 38 yrs and children and now grandchildren to help me ,,whats most important is i can talk about it now and not hide it ,,what a relief that is ,,,,thanks for the chance to say something and god bless all..carol

Carol,

It must have been quite refreshing to be able to share that secret. I'm so glad that you have found yourself on a journey that leads to healing. Good for you!