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Joined: Apr 2006
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Gecko
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Well everytime you turn on the news, it's always about sex offendors, online predators, etc. They seem to come from all walks of life too. More women are committing this crime as well than what we knew in the past.
What do you think is the deep hidden mentality behind these actions & behaviors as to why they do it? And is it different for men compared to women? If so, what do you think the difference is?

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Gecko
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Hey forcegx7!

Welcome to the forum!

Wow, you just asked a million dollar question and you would deserve a trillion dollars,
if you could come up with a single defining answer for it.

Doctors, therapists, psychiatrist say, rape isn't about sex it's about power and control.

Then, they say the male sexual predator is sick in the mind so to speak, organically -- chemically.

Then, with the female sexual predator there seems to be such a double standard --
she's suffering from emotional issues.

And, you are absolutely correct Sexual Predators, rapists, etc. come from all walks of life.
They wear suits, ties, baggy jeans, baseball caps, dresses, evening gown and all kinds of attire.
They live condos, mansions, public housing & you name it.

And, most importantly they can be found anywhere and everywhere OUR Children are at.

Vicki L. Forte'
Bellaonline
Crime Editor

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Gecko
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Hey forcegx7!

I came back, becuz I never personally answered your question.
I gave you the answers from the good doctors and therapists.

I don't know what could possibly be going on in these individuals minds.

Is it SEX or is it a SICKNESS? I don't know?
But, how could they not know, that it is wrong and immoral to have sex with children?

I just heard about a case, where a daycare teacher repeatedly had sex with her 4 year old boy/child student in the bathroom.

She told authorities, that He had seduced her.

With what? His oreo cookies, crayons & coloring books.
Is she sick, crazy or over sexed? I don't know...

And, how could a man not know rape isn't what a woman wants?
Especially, when she's screaming yelling fighting pleading and begging.

Why would he go on? Is he sick, crazy or over sexed?
Or, is it simply the power?

Vicki L. Forte'
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Chipmunk
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DO we Really want to know what goes on in their minds?

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Quote:
DO we Really want to know what goes on in their minds?


Uhh yeah. It would help us figure out hopefully prevent it from happening.

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Hey free spirit,

I felt your meaning behing your words, I got it.
But, I feel the same as forcegx7 it's also good to know what the enemy camp is thinking.

Gotta protect our babies and kids.

Vicki L. Forte'
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Hi Vicki and our original poster,
As a victim of child sexual abuse I can ony give you my thoughts on what motivated my abusers. But I believe it would be different for each person.

Certainly the 'power' thing is uppermost, but in my case it was complicated by other issues as well.

There was a sort of 'sick ritual' involved, which also included the 'fascination' with bodily functions. The girl involved [I now realize she was only in her late teens] was possibly the man's victim as well, and when she was caring for me, I became the 'third person' - to be used as an 'audience' to their sick practices, and made to participate.

I definitely think it is some kind of mental illness. The use of a tiny child is a way of them being able to feel powerful and able to inflict pain on a helpless creature, much the same way as some people take out their anger on a dog or cat.

The man was later jailed for having abused over 100 children. I believe the girl who also abused me was one of the unfortunate 100, and he had a strangle hold on her, having distorted and fractured her mind with his actions. I have to admit that in some weird way I also 'enjoyed' the physical 'love' part of it - because I was deprived of physical affection by my mother. This poor girl provided it, but in a terribly distorted way.

I often wonder what became of her.

As for the man, I hope he is now burning in hell!


Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
John Adams


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Hello Patience

I am so sorry to hear about your terrible experience.I can sense the hurt in your words and it must have been a terrible thing to go through...

Have you ever considered forgiving this man?

Not for his sake but for yours only because as long as he causes you to feel such hatred it is hurting your soul. You need to let it all go and release all the hurt so you can be trully free.

I think you could have a good point there concerning mental illness with perpetrators of abuse - sounds logical.

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I guess I have forgiven him for what he did to me, (forgiveness being a conscious thought and not an emotional 'feeling') but I cannot 'forgive' what he has done to others. Only they can do that. The man was a priest, and that makes it worse.

I am not bitter any more about what was done to me. It was more than 62 years ago. But when I think of the other 100 + lives he destroyed or crippled, I think he should go to the hell he believed in and preached about! ( I personally don't believe in such a place, but I do believe that people reap what they sow, and experience what they believe, so he is probably there by now!)


Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
John Adams


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Gecko
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Patience, I'm sorry to here that you went through that. I think you are brave for being able to talk about it & move on with your life. In terms of Priests or Religious figures, I don't think they should get a free ticket to our trust just because of their status. They are people too & only few of them are spiritualy connected to their faith. Most of them i think just go through the motions. So them being abusers & it's impact really shouldn't be any different than a regular person off the street. The fact that we automatically assume that they are less likely to do such things because of their religious status is ignorance on our part in society. Especially Catholic priests who have to repress alot of thing because they are taught to be matyrs & earning a way into heaven is about sacrifice. I don't completely buy into that.
Another thing that i'd like to talk about is what Vicki Forte mentioned & that is, the double standard for the different sexes. I think not only we have to get to the bottom of psychological reasons as to what is going on in their minds, but the existing double standard needs to be discussed further & exposed for what it is.
The blond teacher in Florida got a slap in the hand because the so-called "victim" didn't want the stress of anymore media coverage. That's a cop-out. I believe that after several times of interviewing this kid, the legal team determined that there was no way this kid could convey that "I was a victim" message to the jury, because probably felt more like a champ or a hero than a victim. He lived every teenage boys fantasy & is probably being treated like a hero by his peers for it.
I'm not saying this is right or wrong, because to the other point just because women are the percieved as the more nurturing sex, doesn't mean they should be treated any different for this crime than men either.
Boys & guys just don't see it as a being victimized. And I'm also interested in opinions as to reasons why that is?

Last edited by forcegx7; 05/17/06 10:57 AM.
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