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#205369 08/12/05 05:41 PM
Joined: Aug 2005
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Lanea Offline OP
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Hi My name is Lanea and I miscarried last night. I was 7 weeks along. I know it doesnt seem very long. but it was long enough for me to get excited and by a bassinet and some maternity clothes. I started bleeding so i went to my doctor and he told me my cervix was still closed. so i had an ultrasound done. and the baby was fine. There wasnt any seperation and we even detected a heartbeat. then i lost it. I think the hardest part of it was seeing the heart beat knowing it was alive inside of me then the next day losing it. People keep telling me that things happen for a reason and i need to get over it. but I dont think its that easy. Coming home to a house with a bunch of babystuff laying around makes it even harder. For everyone else that has had a miscarriage i just want to say to you that People around you may forget but a mother never forgets and thats ok no matter what anyone says!!

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#205370 08/12/05 07:59 PM
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Lanea, I had two miscarriages over 18 years ago and you never forget. Mine were at 10 weeks and 18 weeks and I, too, had seen the 2nd baby on ultrasound (trying to determine due date) and when they retested a couple weeks later, the baby had died. That was hard. I did already have a daughter and I think that made it easier for me.

One thing everyone did tell me (way before I ever got pregnant)was to wait to buy stuff and tell people. (When I later got pregnant with my son, I didn't tell anyone until I was 5 months pregnant! After two miscarriages, I just didn't want everyone to know if it happened again.) My doctors told me that miscarriage happens a lot and in most cases the reasons are a mystery. This kept me from going crazy dissecting my every move, meal and thought!

But, I still remember it all and my kids know about it-- I never considered it a "taboo" subject and it's part of our family history.

Perhaps you can get someone to store your baby stuff for you--or put it in the attic or somewhere. It is fine to mourn your loss because it is a big loss, but don't get stuck there. I have known women who went near crazy over a miscarriage--never working through the grief, resenting anyone else who was pregnant, and so on. That's just not healthy.

My sympathies are with you during this time, and I wish you a full and quick recovery.

#205371 08/16/05 04:37 AM
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We just found out yesterday that our expected baby no longer had a heartbeat. I am twelve weeks along with no symptoms of impending miscarriage until we saw the doctor to hear a heartbeat. This morning I am scheduled for a D&C. This is our second miscarriage in a row. My husband and I are heartbroken. I feel your loss with you. I lost my first at six weeks. Don't ever forgot and continue to try again. Also make sure you depend on your husband. Our struggles have brought us even closer together. It is much easier to get through the initial pain with a team of supporters on your side.

#205372 08/22/05 05:31 PM
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Hello, I am new to this site...and never thought I would talk to other woman about miscarriage...We lost our 10 week baby through miscarriage on August 9th, 2005....it was awful. I have an 8 yr old boy and 3 yr old girl with NO PROBLEM pregnancies and NO OTHER miscarriages...what a shock...We are burying the baby this Saturday and having a memorial...I hope and pray I can get through that.
Thanks for listening...a stay at home mom in WI...Rebecca


Moderated by  Christine - Miscarriage 

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