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Have you had experience of a soul mate or twin flame relationship? <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />
Was the way you met your partner 'fated'. Have you learnt lessons from past or present partners that you would like to share here?

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Hi Lauren,

I consider my present husband my soulmate/twin flame. It definitely seemed fated, especially since our personalities are so very different. Yet, our paths are parallel and our strengths and weaknesses support one another wonderfully.

While my first husband (deceased) and I got along great, it just isn't the same as my present marriage. Hard to put in words! Do you have any experiences, Lauren?

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Hello Janet, thanks for sharing. I've had experience of both a soul mate and a twin flame relationship. I wouldn't say one was better than the other, they were very different from each other.

My ex husband was a soul mate. We were together to sort some karma from past lives, which we both remembered sharing. I think we've treated each other somewhat better this lifetime, so hopefully won't be brought together for karmic reasons again. I'm glad we had our time together & I think we both developed & learnt from each other.

My twin flame relationship has been very intense & volatile, quite unlike anything I've ever experienced before. It's amazing to literally meet your 'other half' & before this I'd always been highly sceptical of the twin flame theory. I couldn't sustain the scepticism though as I got several powerful bits of confirmation that this was indeed my Twin.


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What is your definition of twin flame versus soulmate? <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Me, I never really got caught up in those kind of ideas--feeling there were plenty of great matches out there for me...not just "the one".

But now that I have my husband, it seems like "the one" may come especially when you're not searching for him or her! <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

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I have an article up about this:Soul Mate & Twin Flame Relationships
Essentially you are right, there is more than one soul mate relationship out there for all of us, as we incarnate in soul groups. That's good news for those who have loved & lost. <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />
Your Twin Flame is different- a unique 'match', quite literally your other half. There is only one Twin for you, who may or may not be incarnate at the same time as you are. Like I say I branded it a bit of nonsense until I experienced the difference myself. <img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" />

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Hi Lauren
I said I'd post something one day. I am going through a very intense period with what I thought was my soul mate and may in fact be my twin flame as the feelings are so intense we can hardly be in each other's company for too long sometimes. I know exactly what he's thinking and I accept him just the way he is, unconditionally. It has taken us a long time just to be good friends and, not trying to "blow my own trumpet" I have helped him so much. If you could only see how this shy, nervous and angry man has blossomed! Funny, my son sees it too! I don't know how it will end up but I do know I will always be there for him and he is grateful. Its like I can actually "feel" him as part of me when we are together. Viv

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I feel like I have two in one.
We fit each other like two halves of the same coin.
We are so much alike in some ways and in the ways we are not he is completing me and I him.

There was huge magic when we met. Not just the "Wow, you turn me on kind," but the kind that lets you know you'd better pay attention. Like when he arrived to pick me up for the first date and found a set of maths books his father had written (20 years before) in my Dad's book case...symbolic stuff...astronomic stuff (blue moon<G>)...physical stuff...just all around uncanny stuff. It has continued as it started 17 years ago, and all the really odd things have become part of our personal memoirs. The best of all this soul mate/twin souls thing is how dear we are to each other in this life, how lucky we feel to be together, and how happy we are together. Blessed.

That doesn't mean there aren't times I'd like to take the head off him (or he me), but the intensity and duration of our spats are very short. Indeed, they are always...educational. When we hiss at each other, it's something that should be addressed within ourselves and shows us where we could afford to grow a bit. (I had, and still have, far to go. Him, not so far, as he was a bit farther along when we met.)

He's always been a seeker and I a seer, so when we came together it was indeed a sight to behold.<G> What I find most interesting is that he, who has never "seen the light" himself (he's still too stiff-necked to just let go) brought me right to the door and I just stepped across the threshold. He believes, desires, and would love to, but he just cannot seem to submit to it. Maybe someday.

Well, this is a bit off track, but it's some of what I know about twin souls or soulmate relationships.

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Hello Viv
Welcome to the forum, so glad you made it. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

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I am going through a very intense period with what I thought was my soul mate and may in fact be my twin flame as the feelings are so intense we can hardly be in each other's company for too long sometimes.
This does sound very twin flame like in nature. This one will be a big learning relationship for both of you & you will notice rapid change in yourself, as well as the changes that are happening within him. Powerful stuff!

Quote:
I feel like I have two in one.
We fit each other like two halves of the same coin.
We are so much alike in some ways and in the ways we are not he is completing me and I him.
That is beautiful Mary Ellen. What a wonderful relationship, the sort I think we'd all aspire too. Cherish. <img src="/images/graemlins/kiss.gif" alt="" />
As for the spirituality, I don't know why it is, but these things generally seem harder for men. Maybe it is fear of letting go of control & letting things flow.

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Have you had experience of a soul mate or twin flame relationship? <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />
Was the way you met your partner 'fated'. Have you learnt lessons from past or present partners that you would like to share here?


Are you sure you want to get me started? <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

We had wanted to start a pagan community in our area for a long time. The lovely lady who was working on this had kind of a militant attitude and wasn't getting much interest for longer than a year. I offered to help - I'm a social worker by profession and good with people. I'm not really sure what I did that was so different other than work hard for about two months, but we held a meet and greet and over 20 people showed up. One of the people that responded and came told us about his message board Mystic Wicks I joined and made a few friends.

One of them was a man who was a lot of fun to talk to, was very nice and wrote amazing poetry and stories, which he posted online. He also painted and sculpted. He kept disappearing every few months with no explanation......

Now, this will be a long story, so I will give it to y'all in little chapters.....

To be continued <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" />

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I want to answer this question, because I believe my husband was meant for me, but I don't believe in reincarnation (please, no offense meant to those of you that do). So my answer may not be exactly along the soul mate/ twin flame answer.

My 1st husband I "fell in love with" at 19, quit college (w/ a scholarship - I still shudder), had 2 beautiful children, and went through an unhappy marriage and ugly divorce.

I became a Christian during this ugly process. Afterwards, while I was still bitter and hurting, I remember praying to God and saying, "Lord, I don't know how to be alone, but I don't know how to trust anyone again. If You ever want me to get re-married (my ex had already married the woman he was having the affair w/)You will have to send me the guy, and knock me over the head to let me know he's the one."

About 6 months later was my 10 yr high school reunion. I met up w/ lots of old friends. 1 particular guy, whom I had never dated but been good friends with, just hit it off. A large group of us started going out monthly. Then one month everyone cancelled except me and David. We dated for a year as "just friends" - no kissing, no handholding even. When we decided our feelings went deeper than friendship, we decided to include my children on the dates, because they would be so involved in any permanent decision. My then 2 yr old daughter was terrified of everyone. She did not like for anyone to pick her up except me, not even her grandparents if she had her choice. On the 2nd date, when I went to get her out of the car seat she said, "David hold me." I thought i was going to pass out. Because that's what getting hit over the head by God does to you!
David is everything I have ever wanted, needed, or even imagined. He is my support, my lover, my comforter, my best friend. God gave me the man to fill every hole in my life that needed filling (that a person could fill, God fills the rest).
So is that a soul mate or a twin flame? He completes me (Oh how I hate to use anything Mr. Cruise ever said) <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />
He is my other half (definitely the better half!), my missing piece! <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />


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I like the thought of incarnating in soul groups - I have a group of friends - found in the late 70s with whom I feel like family. Men, women, children - I can't describe the feeling of comfort and familiarity I feel in their presence or thinking of them. Our paths have intermingled the past 25+ years!

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One of them was a man who was a lot of fun to talk to, was very nice and wrote amazing poetry and stories, which he posted online. He also painted and sculpted. He kept disappearing every few months with no explanation......

Now, this will be a long story, so I will give it to y'all in little chapters.....


I think we all enjoy true love stories. It is heart warming whether we are in a loving relationship or not to know that people can share these beautiful feelings.

So...time for the next instalment I think Parthena <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Thank you for sharing your beautiful story with us Musicalmom. People from many belief systems contribute to this forum, so don't apologise for not believing in reincarnation.
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"Lord, I don't know how to be alone, but I don't know how to trust anyone again. If You ever want me to get re-married (my ex had already married the woman he was having the affair w/)You will have to send me the guy, and knock me over the head to let me know he's the one."

It is so powerful to state your needs and requests clearly and from the heart. A request is needed for our Angels and Guides to intervene on our behalf. Glad they didn't take you too literally & give you a bang on the head <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> We all need to remember that our prayers really are listened to & then watch out for the way they get answered.

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Are you sure you want to get me started? <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

We had wanted to start a pagan community in our area for a long time. The lovely lady who was working on this had kind of a militant attitude and wasn't getting much interest for longer than a year. I offered to help - I'm a social worker by profession and good with people. I'm not really sure what I did that was so different other than work hard for about two months, but we held a meet and greet and over 20 people showed up. One of the people that responded and came told us about his message board Mystic Wicks I joined and made a few friends.

One of them was a man who was a lot of fun to talk to, was very nice and wrote amazing poetry and stories, which he posted online. He also painted and sculpted. He kept disappearing every few months with no explanation......

Now, this will be a long story, so I will give it to y'all in little chapters.....

To be continued <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" />


Quote:
So...time for the next instalment I think Parthena


So.....after this had occurred several times and was about to again, I sent him a private message and he told me he had cystic fibrosis and would be in the hospital for about 2 weeks. I'd found out that he only lived 60 miles from me and the hospital was even closer, about 30 miles. I asked if he wanted a visitor and he was hesitant, but did give me the room number. He later explained his hesitancy - another patient had an online acquaintance visit who was rather unattractive and had tried to get in bed with him....as it turned out, he also knew the guy with the message board, who assured him that I was "hot" <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

I went up for a visit and found him to be very shy, but we talked for a long time. I brought him a reiki-charged crystal and notes from the other people on the forum, making him guess who said what. We had a very nice visit, and I decided to visit again.

After our second visit, I walked to my car shaking my head and hands at the Divine, saying:

I could fall in love with this man in a heartbeat and he's going to die????? <img src="/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> What are you trying to do to me?

We were both hesitant to get into a relationship because of his illness (CF is progressive and terminal), but he was more fearful than I was. I was ready to give up on him. Our mutual friends invited us both to dinner and then to a birthday party for their son, after which I tackled him in their driveway for a good night kiss......

to be continued.....if I bump a key on this laptop I lose my whole post <img src="/images/graemlins/computer.gif" alt="" /> so I'm quitting while I'm ahead

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Quote:
I could fall in love with this man in a heartbeat

<img src="/images/graemlins/heart.gif" alt="" />That's a wonderful phrase Parthena- makes you go very warm inside. Love really isn't about how long in years a relationship lasts is it? That's just the way society measures things...and what fun to be described as 'hot'. It may not be politically correct to admit it these days, but it's great to know someone rates you as a foxy lady isn't it? <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Awaiting the next episode with interest...

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Quote:
I could fall in love with this man in a heartbeat

<img src="/images/graemlins/heart.gif" alt="" />That's a wonderful phrase Parthena- makes you go very warm inside. Love really isn't about how long in years a relationship lasts is it? That's just the way society measures things...and what fun to be described as 'hot'. It may not be politically correct to admit it these days, but it's great to know someone rates you as a foxy lady isn't it? <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Awaiting the next episode with interest...


<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Yes, indeed it was nice to be described that way! After our second talk, I definitely was feeling very warm inside and had a deep knowing that he could be 'the one.' I had several talks with friends about my hesitancy and they pointed out that there was no guarantee that I wouldn't die first, and how by passing this up I could miss out on the most wonderful love of my life.

He had seen what his mother went through (and still is) when his sister died from CF at age 18. He said that he didn't want to be the cause of anyone going through that kind of pain.

One of the same friends I spoke to had the same talk with him, and after that goodnight kiss, we moved into a relationship. We lived 60 miles apart and he wanted me to move in with him. I'd left my last long term relationship because he wouldn't make a commitment, so I told him that I wouldn't do that without a commitment. He readily agreed, but we had one little problem.

He was on disability and if we got legally married, I either couldn't work or if I did, he would lose his medical benefits.

We agreed on a "handfasting," a wedding ritual in front of the Divine and all our family and friends. Now, handfastings are legal, but we went through ours with a fine tooth comb to discredit that just in case there was ever a question. It was a beautiful ceremony, and one of the attendees told me that during the ritual, she'd had a vision that we had been together in many lifetimes and would be together in more. She said, "Death is only a temporary separation."

Almost finished, but have to run off for an appointment about a job.....wish me luck!

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I have had a few relationships that were with soul mates both friendly and intimate. I have a friend who I speak to almost everyday online and I swear we were separated at birth! She can tell what I am feeling and thinking. We sometimes say the same thing but only in different words. We are working together on a fiction novel and it is so funny, when she brought up what her book idea was, it was so similiar to mine it was scary. I always tell her to get the heck out of my head LOL

I think my fiance' is my twin flame. We dated for a short while back in 2002 and things were so intense between the 2 of us so quickly that we got scared and ran from each other. I was crushed and went thru a severe depression afterward. I have never experienced that before after a break up. He started dating someone and broke up with her because he couldn't stop thinking about me. But by that time, I was back with my son's father. I thought about this man every day we were apart. I mean literally everyday for a little over a year. Then I started college and got online on one of those instant messenger services. He was on and my heart skipped a beat. He said he just happened to sign on that day because he hadn't in a long time. SOunds like Fate was in the works for us that day don't you think? We talked for months and I even tried to hook him up with a friend of mine at college but he and I ended up back together and we have been inseparable ever since. The thing about us is when we get along, we get along great but there are times when he aggrivates the heck out of me and we have to separate ourselves for awhile because feelings get so intense between the 2 of us. We have a daughter together and she is the perfect combination of us both *smile*


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It was a beautiful ceremony, and one of the attendees told me that during the ritual, she'd had a vision that we had been together in many lifetimes and would be together in more. She said, "Death is only a temporary separation."

And so it is. How wonderful Parthena that you brought such love and companionship into this man's last few years in this lifetime, & that you did not let fear of the situation rob you of great love.

Quote:
Almost finished, but have to run off for an appointment about a job.....wish me luck!

<img src="/images/graemlins/irish.gif" alt="" /> Best of luck, I hope it came through for you if it was what you wanted. Let us know how you got on.

Quote:
I have a friend who I speak to almost everyday online and I swear we were separated at birth! She can tell what I am feeling and thinking. We sometimes say the same thing but only in different words. We are working together on a fiction novel and it is so funny, when she brought up what her book idea was, it was so similiar to mine it was scary. I always tell her to get the heck out of my head LOL
She certainly sounds like a member of your soul group Jeanette. It sounds like you have a joint creative purpose- definitely not just chance that your ideas were so similar.

Quote:
I think my fiance' is my twin flame. We dated for a short while back in 2002 and things were so intense between the 2 of us so quickly that we got scared and ran from each other. I was crushed and went thru a severe depression afterward. I have never experienced that before after a break up. He started dating someone and broke up with her because he couldn't stop thinking about me. But by that time, I was back with my son's father. I thought about this man every day we were apart. I mean literally everyday for a little over a year.
I can identify with that one. The nature of a twin flame relationship is that overpowering & you feel more alone than you have ever been if it ends. I'm so glad that fate has brought you back together. <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />

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While he is very male, he loves his feminine side (and so do I!). I think the difficulty with letting go of control has something to do with organized religion. He craves his Saul of Tarsus moment, but in the back of his mind, he's not about to allow himself to be naive. What if he gets all mushy about it?

I would love to see him open his eyes after meditation wearing a glow. I'm afraid meditation for him is just an exercise in sitting still and waiting for "something" to happen.

He's been waiting for a long, long time. He spent a year in a Gurdjieff house in England some years ago and I wonder if the work there is somehow preventing him from letting the light in. From what I gather, there was no light work there. Maybe I'm wrong, and if so, I apologize to all the Gurdjieffians who may be reading.

This isn't a problem as such; it's more that I would love to share the sensations and illuminations that I find when my eyes are closed and my breathing just right...and maybe even someday, what happens when the snake uncoils!

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He's been waiting for a long, long time. He spent a year in a Gurdjieff house in England some years ago and I wonder if the work there is somehow preventing him from letting the light in. From what I gather, there was no light work there.

I'm pretty ignorant I'm afraid about what would go on in a Gurdjieff community. Possibly your partner has different skills to yours. You are clearly pretty visual, but not everyone who meditates has light & pictures. They aren't doing it wrong, but they may instead be stronger in their other senses. However he may be suffering from 'performance anxiety' because he isn't getting the visuals. Encourage him to relax into the meditation with no fixed expectations. Perhaps words or phrases might pop into his head 'from nowhere'; maybe this is fledgling clairaudience. If he's more clairsentient he may just get a feeling about people & places that is hard to explain in rational terms.

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This isn't a problem as such; it's more that I would love to share the sensations and illuminations that I find when my eyes are closed and my breathing just right...

Have you tried meditating together face to face, holding hands and matching the speed of your breath? He may not see what you see, but it could be a very intimate shared experience nonetheless. <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />

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and maybe even someday, what happens when the snake uncoils!
I expect one day it will...

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I'll pop in here for a moment in my 'role' as meditation editor -

One way to experience joy in and after meditation is to think lovingly on at least one person (or pet) during the reflective part of the meditation.

In some way this relaxes us to the universal joy of feeling connected without bounds to the animate and inanimate world, alike.

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Gurdjieff people seem to talk about "the work" a lot. I still haven't been able to get much of substance from what he told me other than that there were many disciplines practiced. Since he likes hard work, this must have appealed to him.
Yes, I am visual, and from what I observe, so is he. Boy! He can take in a whole scene in about a second.
I love the idea of meditating while connected. Maybe that would be just the thing. I never thought of it.
Thanks.

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Susan, that's a great idea! Maybe we could both think about our son and he might slip into the mode without that "performance anxiety." (I know that's what it is. He _would_ get anxious, and reassurance would only increase it.)
Next time we're alone and the mood is right, I'm going to see if he wants to give it another go.
Even though I had always found it pretty easy to meditate, I was totally unable to "go there" for a couple of years after my dad died. I meditated once a couple of days after the funeral and saw swirls of green, then rose, then red...each color distinct and in gentle swirls, but no white, no bright, no fireworks. And then I saw nothing for several years. I was desolate. It's starting to come back, but the character of it is different. I haven't had any of the fireworks; it's more gentle. And I've had a lot more body business to take care of, so I guess I've not been on a very high level.
When I was at my best, though, I could fly among the stars! Sometimes it was so good, it was really, really scary.

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And so it is. How wonderful Parthena that you brought such love and companionship into this man's last few years in this lifetime, & that you did not let fear of the situation rob you of great love.

Quote:
Almost finished, but have to run off for an appointment about a job.....wish me luck!

<img src="/images/graemlins/irish.gif" alt="" /> Best of luck, I hope it came through for you if it was what you wanted. Let us know how you got on.


I won't know anything about the job for two weeks, but since they can't find anyone in this area I have a pretty good chance! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Yes, I have no regrets. We had three wonderful years together and although our time was far too short, he was the most wonderful love of my life. Living with him taught me so much, and he was such an amazing human being - he'll inspire me for the rest of my life.

He gave me much more than I could ever give him. Losing him has been so incredibly painful, but this is another reason I know that he was my soulmate. When he died, I felt as though half of myself had been ripped away. I have actually been in real, physical pain.

Still having computer kablooeys <img src="/images/graemlins/computer.gif" alt="" /> so I'll be back to comment on the other stories <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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Thanks for popping in with the advice Susan <img src="/images/graemlins/easter.gif" alt="" />

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I haven't had any of the fireworks; it's more gentle. And I've had a lot more body business to take care of, so I guess I've not been on a very high level.
When I was at my best, though, I could fly among the stars! Sometimes it was so good, it was really, really scary.
Mary Ellen the fireworks are great, but don't judge your level of spiritual development by them. I suspect you have been quietly making good progress on your path. Jessica Macbeth in her excellent guide to meditation 'Moon Over Water' explains that the visuals aren't the main goal of the meditator & the real value of meditation lies beyond these (shucks).
I hope you and your man have a go at matching the breath. Just don't blame me for whatever happens afterwards <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

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When he died, I felt as though half of myself had been ripped away. I have actually been in real, physical pain.

It strikes me that you are in need of a good healer Parthena. Feeling the pain has made the whole experience very vivid, but your hubby wouldn't want you to suffer any pain I'm sure. Do you have anyone experienced that you can trust?

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I won't know anything about the job for two weeks, but since they can't find anyone in this area I have a pretty good chance!

Sounds pretty promising <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Let us know.

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Good luck with the job, Parthena! If you want it, let it be the best one you've ever had.

I feel your loss, and I wish you so much tangible evidence that he is still with you that you know the joy and peace that accompany spiritual union.

Here's one for you. After dad died, DH and I were driving past the cemetery. I mused to John, "I wonder what Dad would want on the headstone?" Quick as thought, Dad's voice was in my ear, booming, "I was right!"

To know him was to know how much "him" this was. The tone, the volume, the accent, and the content...all him, not me. Though we are alike in many ways, that reflexive, boasting yet accurate, explosion of thought was (and is) nobody but my dad. There have been many, many such episodes involving people who have passed on and I take them as real.

Sometimes there is a little "warning" before someone passes on, and it's a kindness so I am not taken totally unawares when I get news. I don't recognize it until after, though, thankfully, so I'm not worrying about everyone all the time. <img src="/images/graemlins/beamedup.gif" alt="" />

Peace,
Mary Ellen

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Good luck with the job, Parthena! If you want it, let it be the best one you've ever had.

I feel your loss, and I wish you so much tangible evidence that he is still with you that you know the joy and peace that accompany spiritual union.

Here's one for you. After dad died, DH and I were driving past the cemetery. I mused to John, "I wonder what Dad would want on the headstone?" Quick as thought, Dad's voice was in my ear, booming, "I was right!"

To know him was to know how much "him" this was. The tone, the volume, the accent, and the content...all him, not me. Though we are alike in many ways, that reflexive, boasting yet accurate, explosion of thought was (and is) nobody but my dad. There have been many, many such episodes involving people who have passed on and I take them as real.

Sometimes there is a little "warning" before someone passes on, and it's a kindness so I am not taken totally unawares when I get news. I don't recognize it until after, though, thankfully, so I'm not worrying about everyone all the time. <img src="/images/graemlins/beamedup.gif" alt="" />

Peace,
Mary Ellen


Thanks, {{{Mary Ellen}}} I'm a bit disappointed in the job but it'll do until my "real" job expands into full time.

And thanks so much for the encouragement. Most days I feel so close to him and almostt always feel him just on the "edge" of my dreams - in fact, he's inspired the last 3 or 4 articles I've written; all of them have come from dreams I've had.

Yes, there were signs and I didn't want to see it or deal with it. While I probably would have been even more stressed and worried, it was always in the back of my mind so I was worried and stressed anyway. I wish I'd dealt with it differently. Live and learn, I guess....

We had a little under three years, and I'd always thought it would be longer. Our handfasting was so magical I just didn't see that our life together wouldn't be long and perfect and I'm still in shock.

I was in a lot of pain after my first husband and I separated. He was my first love and there were other painful things involved, but this is pain on a different level. It's hard to put it into words.

It's raised a lot of questions for me and I suppose that is good for my spiritual growth, but I'd rather he was still here.

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It's raised a lot of questions for me and I suppose that is good for my spiritual growth, but I'd rather he was still here.

I don't think anyone could expect anything else from you. The bit that was good for your spiritual growth was the depth of the relationship itself. Those last three years will have moved both of you along so far together.

These are early days & you mustn't expect too much of yourself. You will move onwards, the pain will gradually fade over time & you will be left with the warmth of your memories & the knowledge that he is around you.

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It's raised a lot of questions for me and I suppose that is good for my spiritual growth, but I'd rather he was still here.

I don't think anyone could expect anything else from you. The bit that was good for your spiritual growth was the depth of the relationship itself. Those last three years will have moved both of you along so far together.

These are early days & you mustn't expect too much of yourself. You will move onwards, the pain will gradually fade over time & you will be left with the warmth of your memories & the knowledge that he is around you.


Thanks {{{Lauren}}} I'm taking my time.

I had a down day on Tuesday and asked him for help. On Wednesday, I pulled up to one of my calls and got what I'm sure was a sign from him -

When we'd first met, he made me laugh when he said he wanted to get a "hanging Jew" for his deck. This is a type of coleus plant commonly known as a "wandering Jew."

From the wooden awning hung about six of the biggest plants I've ever seen, around 2 feet in diameter and 4 feet in length. I just gasped and said, "Baby, look at all those hangin' Jews!" <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

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Hmmm...replied to your post before Parthena, but post doesn't seem to have made it onto the forum <img src="/images/graemlins/computer.gif" alt="" />

Anyhow, I think you were *meant* to see the plants too. Why don't you buy some & make tending them a special time to think of him?

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Okaaaay, Parthena, just before I read your post, I was studying the pair of hanging pots with Wandering Jews, Moses in the Cradle, and Swedish Ivy, all woven together. What's unususal? When I stuck the slips of these plants into these two identical pots in the spring, I did something I never do; I hung them cockeyed off the same plant-hanger (a wrought iron squirrel). That would bother me, them being so close together and crooked like that. (Okay, I'm a little compulsive about some things.) Anyway, these plants are very important to me, as they are all great, great...great-grandchildren of my mother's plants. I keep slips in water over winter and plant anew on New Year's Day, every year without fail.

Now, looking up at those two cockeyed pots, the only thing I can see is the lush growth of these three plants as each has made way for the other and they all get their share of the sun. They have woven into a beautiful collage of purples and green.

Mom passed nearly 20 years ago, but I keep as many of her original plants as I can. It comforts me, and it helps keep her memory in the forefront, even when I'm not thinking about her.

Yep, I'd call that Wandering Jew a sign. They're all around, even when we make them ourselves. What's a sign but a reminder to remember? So much of the grief we feel is the fear that we will forget the love we've had. It's a raw thing, and any ritual that warms the heart will help it to heal.

When DH and I met, he laughed (with glee, not derision) at my "altars." I'd never thought of them as that (then), but indeed he saw them for what they are, little places with precious memories or intentions.

I guess a plant in a pot can be a kind of altar as well, eh?

XOX,
Mary Ellen

P.S. ...don't overwater

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Hmmm...replied to your post before Parthena, but post doesn't seem to have made it onto the forum <img src="/images/graemlins/computer.gif" alt="" />

Anyhow, I think you were *meant* to see the plants too. Why don't you buy some & make tending them a special time to think of him?


If I bump a key on this computer, I lose an entire post! <img src="/images/graemlins/computer.gif" alt="" />and for some reason the Bella boards make them magically disappear forever! <img src="/images/graemlins/beamedup.gif" alt="" />

HaHaHa, I have so many plants from the funeral to take care of, more are out of the question <img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" /> It takes an hour to water them plus my herb garden daily in this 100+ degree heat!

Interestingly, someone online did a brief reading for me and said that he was fine and wanted to give me white flowers, "lilies, I think." The next day, the peace lily had 9 new blooms!

Mary Ellen, that's amazing! And while driving home last night, a certain song came on the radio that was another reminder that became a sign. I was singing at the top of my lungs, and saw an overweight, limping man walking down the highway away from his stalled car. I immediately called the Highway Patrol.

Joe's car had broken down on that same highway. He didn't have a cell phone and ended up walking to an exit. He'd been trying to flag someone down and no one would help. Someone finally called the highway patrol but by then he'd walked, without oxygen because he didn't want to lug the heavy tank. This incident was what kicked off his awful panic attacks.

The song, btw, is "Radar Love." <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

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I was singing at the top of my lungs, and saw an overweight, limping man walking down the highway away from his stalled car. I immediately called the Highway Patrol.

That's another 'Invisible Act of Power'- they all add up. <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" /> Caroline Myss would be proud of you. Shame no-one was on hand to be an angel for Joe that time. Radar Love's a great song <img src="/images/graemlins/music.gif" alt="" />

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It takes an hour to water them plus my herb garden daily in this 100+ degree heat!
Gosh I thought I had plenty of plants to water- I guess our Summer heat isn't quite the same as yours. <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

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I was singing at the top of my lungs, and saw an overweight, limping man walking down the highway away from his stalled car. I immediately called the Highway Patrol.

That's another 'Invisible Act of Power'- they all add up. <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" /> Caroline Myss would be proud of you. Shame no-one was on hand to be an angel for Joe that time. Radar Love's a great song <img src="/images/graemlins/music.gif" alt="" />

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It takes an hour to water them plus my herb garden daily in this 100+ degree heat!
Gosh I thought I had plenty of plants to water- I guess our Summer heat isn't quite the same as yours. <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />


Ya know, I didn't even think of it as an invisible act. All I was thinking about was how that song happened to play at that particular moment and remembering that awful night. I don't know about Caroline Myss, but I knew it was what Joe would have wanted me to do!

He had told me that he had rocked out to Radar Love when he drove home after our first date. The words really struck me the other night:

"She send the comfort coming in from above." <img src="/images/graemlins/beamedup.gif" alt="" />

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All I was thinking about was how that song happened to play at that particular moment and remembering that awful night. I don't know about Caroline Myss, but I knew it was what Joe would have wanted me to do!

He had told me that he had rocked out to Radar Love when he drove home after our first date. The words really struck me the other night:

"She send the comfort coming in from above."

I have several students who get a special song play just when they need a sign. It's a great way to get a message through.

I saw a guy who was inextricably linked in my mind with the Blondie song 'I'm Always Touched by Your Presence Dear'. As I was driving over to see him before anything had happened between us I got an urge to switch on the car radio, which I rarely do, just as the DJ announced the song & played it. <img src="/images/graemlins/music.gif" alt="" />

You certainly had Joe bowled over from the very first didn't you? <img src="/images/graemlins/lovers.gif" alt="" />

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Hi there! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> sorry for the long ::babble::
Seven years ago, with the help of two of my friends, we managed to locate my Twin Soul/Flame. Were were fated to know of each other in this lifetime?...no I don't think so...it was by chance that I met these two friends, and even more by chance that the conversation turned to Soulmates. I have learned that we can make/have many Soulmates along our journey, however we have only one Twin Soul/Twin Flame. My T.S. is not incarnated with me on Earth at this time. aw....wish he was here! He describes himself as a 'shining mark' of energy; he describes his realm/home as a kind of elysian OZ. We do not use the word 'happy' but rather 'content'. He calls me his 'queen' (I'm an old Soul ha ha), and I call him 'king'. We are connected on the rainbow bridge, and I picture the path to him as a golden road. He calls me his "wife to be" and says that he can 'instruct me'. He calls our love 'a heavenly love', that is, unconditional. (the more we intersect the more we will connect!) Presently we are connected on a cosmic Affinity Chatline...("...throw me a line if I reach it in time I'll meet you up there where the path runs straight and high..." lyrics from 'Going To California'--Led Zeppelin...this song is about an astral trip to meet his Twin Soul/his queen). When I want to be with my T.S. I say, 'I seek my T.S. as he seeks me...I project myself to him'. <img src="/images/graemlins/beamedup.gif" alt="" /> I'm still getting to know his 'signature'. We connect on more than one level and so I look for symbols of our connection in my dreams. (I've noticed that since I've been aware of his existence, my own Higher Self communicates messages to me very strongly in my dreams (symbols) so you'll find me in the Dream Dictionaries alot! For example, I dreamed I went through a portal and a young girl with extra-ordinary psychic abilities wrote a message to me in my journal, a reassurance that I was 'perfectly safe'...) (I keep a Journey/nal on the Astral Plane, part of the Chatline, where I can receive/transmit messages to/from others and hopefully recall them in my dreams!). When I want to talk to my T.S., I light a candle and talk to the flame, especially the violet/blue colour; or I go to 'http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter .cfm' and light a candle. Another way is to imagine a cool violet flame and imagine us in it together. I've had amazing luck using the divination system 'Stichomancy' at 'www facade com') (think love & ask a ?). When I use the 'poetry' category, he writes poetry to me. aw. This is lovely for me because I've never really been in a romantic relationship and I'd love to be. I have felt the ecstatic whole-body warmth of him only once so far but I know for sure that he's as real as I am...("...so glad to be falling for the beauty within..." lyrics from 'King's Horses'--Robert Plant...I intensely like Robert too! LoL ...and we're the same age). I have practiced Tantra meditation as a single for 7 years now and I can imagine my T.S. with me. (My belief is not in just a God, but instead, God/Goddess.) I've have had an out-of-body experience, (my) consciousness-only in the universe of love we live in...wow...what an experience to be like a ball of energetic love bouncing around in/up there! I've also noticed and now believe in synchronicity. For example on Valentine's Day I got a phone call...the man said to me, 'Happy Valentine's Day' and I said 'oh you must have the wrong number!'...he said, 'you were meant to hear that'...I was blown away that a stranger would say that to me and so was he! So I guess what I'm looking for is "You've found your Twin Soul--now what!"; ways to strengthen the bond between us, not just the Soul to Soul, but the cognisant telepathic mind to mind, and so I continue my search within my heart and on the internet. If I should meet/fall in love with a spiritual (Tantra) man/companion here, my only criteria is that we be able to talk openly about this subject. (alas, my 30-year marriage fell apart...no common goals). My self/ego urges for a relationship here, but I'm willing to forego one in favour of my Twin Soul. One other thing...I've been in-love but it's not as strong in comparison to the feeling of being 'unconditionally loved'. I wish everyone could experience it! (P.S. Lauren...I'll go to the 'touchstones' website, thanks. BTW, I live in Toronto but my ancestor was 'Elihu Yale' from Wales...it's googleable *:/ Namaste everyone...I recognize and honour the divine lover in you! TTFN


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Hi everyone! I know I'm now married to my soul mate - we connected instantly and have discovered several past lives together already. I have a feeling there are more! He is amazing - so accepting and encouraging of me - but he also challenges me. I've grown more with him than I ever did in my previous relationship (mind you, that one was all about control and systematic eroding of my self-confidence. That's enough about that!)

Can I be a bit controversial and challenge the twin flame idea? The only thing that makes me uncomfortable about it is that it suggests we are incomplete as just ourselves and I'm not sure I can accept that. Can anyone help me on that one?

Soul mates are definitely not limited to romantic partners. I have an incredible link with my youngest son who sometimes acts as if he's my parent and not the other way around. He asked once if I was going to be his mum in the "next world". I said I wasn't sure what would happen so he said he would come and find me there - what a sweetie!

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Welcome Lyrica, what an impressive long post!

Your Twin Flame relationship is a great example of the way we can connect even when our beloved isn't incarnated at the same time as us. Your experience has all the hallmarks of being your twin indeed and it is wonderful that you have experienced yourself as pure energy consciousness.

I know what you mean by unconditional love. When I first met my main guide in the spirit realms I was overwhelmed by that feeling of love & just wanted to be up there with him! We all have reasons for being down here- but it is quite a compensation to know they are waiting for us when we cross over isn't it?

Robert Plant is amazing - I bet he'd have us all queuing up to claim him as a soul mate <img src="/images/graemlins/kiss.gif" alt="" />

Thanks for the candle link- what a lovely idea that is.
http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?l=ENG&s=f

Hope to hear from you on the forum again <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Sara you are blessed to be with your soul mate now. I do think he's your twin flame. Even the ex- & we won't go there- was a soul mate. Sometimes soul mates teach us the harshest lessons.

As far as being complete goes- well there is a deep human urge to be in a loving relationship isn't there? I think that is symptomatic of the feeling of searching we have for our twin flame. This doesn't mean that it is always better to be with someone- and to be needy in a relationship is unhealthy. You are right though, we all contain a spark of the Divine and to be in contact with that spark can make us feel whole without anyone else- which means when the 'right person' comes along we can take the relationship to a much more spiritual level.

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Thanks Lauren, that's clearer and I'm ok with that. I definitely believe in the complementary nature of male and female energy and the equal need for both to achieve balance and harmony. There's no point in even trying to think men and women are the same - my husband, Manny, and I laugh about the differences now, even though they can sometimes be extremely annoying to both sides ("you know I can only think of one thing at once" he whines when I'm bombarding him with information!!!!)

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Lauren, are soul mates and twin flames always the opposite sex? I do not quite understand the twin flame idea (some things take a while to compute) but I took a test with colors and the results said my daughter was my twin flame. When she was young she used to say that she was me and I was her. Like we were the same person. <img src="/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

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Hi Firefly
The received wisdom is always that twin flames are male and female as this gives the balance of yin and yang energy.

My experience of past lives is that we spend some lives as female & others as male. We also may change relationships with soul group members, sometimes taking turns to be the mother/brother/lover. I would say your daughter is almost certainly a part of your soul group and that you will have known each other closely in other lifetimes too, so much so that your energies feel very familiar to each other. I'm less certain that you could be twin flames but I'm willing to be proven wrong!

PS I replied to your raven info in the mythology forum as I couldn't find your email address <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

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Hey Firefly!

I did a term paper waaaaay long ago on telepathy in regards to family; specifically on twins and on the mother/child bond.

I won't get into the twin thing here (we've all heard it, but it is fascinating), but the mother bond is amazingly strong! First to consider that for approximately 9 months you and your child are completely attached to each other. Then for the first year or two, this same child is completely dependant upon you for all of her needs. If you happen to breastfeed (as i did my daughter for the 1st year), then you still have that physical connection. Then you add in genes and science, and all sorts of things that people can't explain about the human mind; and it makes you wonder.

Mom's often know when their children are in danger, whether they are close or not. But when a mother and child have been close throughout early childhood, then I believe the chance for a telepathic connection is even greater.

When I went thru my divorce, Jordan was only 1, yet she vomited almost every day - her pediatrician felt she was developing a pre-ulcerous condition. I had already weaned her from breast - so I don't feel I was giving her "bad milk" due to my stress, but she felt it none the less. When I have my screaming nightmares, Jordan & Seth both tend to sleep erratically, but Jordan especially. When I have my black depression days or am sick, they both come down in temperment and in patience with me (which does not make for a happy household for my poor husband!)

But it is my daughter that is the most closely tuned to me, whether it is because we are of the same sex, or because I was able to breastfeed her longer than the two boys I don't know. Michael has never had that kind of bond with me (outside of his infacy - past 2 yr old), I'm assuming because of his Asperger's - he's very inward focused.

Maybe you have the same type mother/daughter mental- soul bond that so many have; that is not necessarily a twin flame thing, but is just a mother thing.


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Hello, this is my first posting. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Two months ago I met a man who I felt connected with immediately. So much so it was scary. We had coffe together once, emailed several times, chatted and I went to his place once and we talked for seven hours. Then a week later he tells me his life is a wreck and "things won't be too exciting for a while". I haven't heard from him since. Friends have told a friend of mine he isn't speaking to anyone. Now here is my question. I have met a lot of men over the years, I can't get this one out of my head. I feel so connected even though I barely know him. While we were talking at his place I asked him if he believed in past lives and he said yes. At the time I was hoping to have the guts to ask if he felt the same connection. He is in my dreams nightly and I keep thinking (since the moment I met him) about how much I have missed him.

Has anyone ever had an experience like this? If so any advice on how to deal with it? I know if he was into me he would be calling etc. However I can't get this feeling out of my head that he feels the same connection. Does this sound like a twin flame situation?

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Hello Skystars and welcome!

Yes this does sound like a twin flame situation, or at the very least a soulmate that you have been with in a past life. I can't be with my twin flame & miss him like no-one else in the world, it's hard to cope with sometimes.

Don't assume though that he isn't into you because he doesn't contact you. I'm sure your man will have felt that connection too- it's hard to miss something that strong. He may be scared by it. You also don't know what else is going on for him right now, give him space and time to sort himself out.

If it is meant to work out the guides will keep pulling away at all the strings and whispering in his ear, so don't give up hope.

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I see your point. Our bond is very strong, and not even death can break it. <img src="/images/graemlins/heart.gif" alt="" />

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This is semi-embarassing for me, I'm kind of a "shy" person.. but really-- this is very difficult to contain any longer and finding this forum seems Godsent. I thank all of you for posting your experiences; even though I don't know any of you, you have helped me. I guess I should get on with the story.

About two years ago(I'm not quite sure of the date, I'll have to ask him), I met someone accidently and the feeling I got when he showed me his picture was ..I can't even explain it. I swore to him on everything that I was that I knew him. Somehow. He said the same, which intrigued me. We conversated for what must have been six or more hours. It seemed like forever, but in that little time, we became extremely close. I instantly opened up to him and he did the same to me-- which wasn't normal for the either of us considering we're both not that trusting. We talked about everything from past experiences, religion, goals, pain.. you name it, we discussed it. We were always closer with each other than we were with anyone else. It has always been more intimate, much deeper.. I don't really know how to describe it. I had never felt this way before and I believed that nothing could top it, until I seen him face to face.

I walked into his house with my boyfriend at the time(his best friend) and as I entered his room, me and my boyfriend heard a loud crash. Apparently, someone had a little accident. My boyfriend walked into the bathroom and there he was, laying on the floor in a towel soaking wet with a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. He slipped and fell, and my boyfriend thought it was hilarious but I couldn't find it in myself to laugh. I was lost. When I looked into his eyes, the feeling I got was electrifying. It stunned me, it stopped me dead in my tracks. When he stood up, he looked me in my face and I could feel exactly what he was feeling. I knew what he was thinking, I knew everything that was going on inside of him.. and little did I know, it was mutual. Despite the fact that he was soaking wet, I hugged him and wow, the feeling got more intense. I think of it and I can feel it. I feel my heart grow warmer, bigger. It makes me tremble.

Every time we see each other, our feelings for each other seem to get stronger. The bond, the connection-- it strengthens. I have never, ever experienced this before and I can barely believe that this is possible. When we are together, I see nothing but him. Everything else disappears from view, nothing could ever be more fascinating. We're always clinging to each other, holding each other, talking for hours. When it's time for either of us to leave, it hurts.. it hurts so much. Thinking of it makes me cry and I consider myself to be an extremely strong person. The last time I saw him was before Hurricane Katrina and just before he was getting out of the car, I had to unlock the handcuffs(it gets that serious) and it brought tears to my eyes to have to do it. My hand started shaking so terribly that I dropped the key. He had to do it. We held hands until he had to seriously get out of the car and when he was pulling his hand away, I could feel myself breaking in two. I lost that feeling of being whole, I lost the feeling of power, I almost lost myself in the moment. I would have cried my eyes out if I was alone in that car.

Now I am seperated from him and will be for a long time due to the hurricane. We're in two different states. He's coming to New Orleans to visit for Christmas.. I long for it, but I am so terrified at the same time. When I think about it, it rips me up inside. I know that we'll have to part again. If I could just explain how much pain that causes us both..

We can't find anything to classify this bond, this relationship under. I've been reading up on Twin Flames for a month or more. Everything I've found explains us, I haven't read a thing about it that says "no". What do you think?

P.S.: I apologize for this being so long. I could go on about it forever. <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />


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Hello Pins & welcome to Bellaonline <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Don't apologise for the length of your post!

Everything you've described says 'twin flame' to me- although I haven't got to the handcuff stage <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I have the same 'wrenched apart' feeling whenever I leave my twin flame. It sometimes makes it too painful to carry on seeing him at all. We can't be together & it hurts to be apart, so I do empathise.

Those people who actually get to have a full on 'normal' relationship with their twin flame are lucky indeed aren't they? Good luck with yours. The encouraging news is that once you've found your 'twin' the bond is there, however thin it gets stretched, he feels it too.

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Pins,

I totally understand what you mean about having this feeling when you look into his eyes. I experienced the same thing. However I haven't seen or spoken to this man in over a month. <img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> I think about him all the time.

I am curious, what happened to your boyfriend? Is he and this man still friends?

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Thank you! I love this forum, I've been reading a lot of the topics and posts. Spent almost two hours doing so last night. <img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" />

I handcuffed him to me to show him that I didn't want him to go, I wanted him to stay next to me. He understood. Somehow he always understands.

I agree. They are very lucky, I wish I could have a "normal" relationship with my twin. It seems like everytime we get close to having one, something pulls us apart.


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If you don't mind my asking; what are some of the "somethings". Maybe we can figure out a way to protect or "ward off" if we know more about what keeps keeping you apart. However if it is age difference, parents, and one of you is a minor - it might take a bit of doing...

Can you give us more detail?


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Quote:
If you don't mind my asking; what are some of the "somethings". Maybe we can figure out a way to protect or "ward off" if we know more about what keeps keeping you apart. However if it is age difference, parents, and one of you is a minor - it might take a bit of doing...

Can you give us more detail?


Sure thing. It used to be things like his job, not having enough money or a way to get to each other, random deaths, me being a minor(sigh). Our schedule's would collide a lot also. Now, though, hurricane Katrina has seperated us. He's in Indiana and I am in Virginia. We found a way around that, I was going to get a plane ticket back to New Orleans so I could see him while he visited for Christmas.. but my grandfather recently let my Uncle, his three kids, his girlfriend and my aunt move in with him. I have no place to go now. <img src="/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> Quite frustrating.


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Well you know I'd take heart from all of this <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> None of these things are insurmountable & if the bond remains strong you'll find a way to get together in the future.

As for the splitting of the friends...well I dated my future husband's friend before I started seeing him. (I'd wanted my husband since I met him, but thought he wasn't interested!) It didn't do their friendship much good either, but we were a couple for 17 years, so I don't feel too bad about that one <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" />

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Even though this man that I think is a twin flame isn't speaking to me I feel like my intution is telling me not to give up. However my brain tells me that it is just me "hoping for what I want" not really my inner voice. Then I think Why hasn't anyone else ever affected me this way? His birthday is Saturday and I want to email to wish him a happy one but I don't want to be pushy. I haven't heard from him in a month. What do other's think? Should I wish him a happy birthday or let him come back to me if he wants?

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"Tune out everyone in the crowd because now it's just me and you. Come fall in love with the sound. Make a pact to each other when no one's around. Put the cross between me and you.."
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He isn't speaking to me or any of his friends right now. I got an email from him stating "things weren't going to be too exciting for a while until I get my life back to normal" He had some drama in his life. On the other hand I look at it like if he was into me he would find time to email, call etc. I can't explain this pull I have towards this man in any other way to say it is a twin flame situation.

I don't want to be the crazy woman emailing him a happy birthday greeting. lol. All I know is that when we first met he spent a lot of time and energy on me. Then it went from a lot to nothing in a matter of a week.

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Hey Pins, who said my husband was my twin? <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> He's a good man though & was a great partner for that phase of my life. He was a soulmate & we both remembered the same past life independently from each other. Hopefully we mended some of the karma this time round.

The good news is you have loads of time to check that your bond with your man is strong enough. Also that you ditched the boyfriend with a violent temper- never put up with that sort of behaviour! Patience...

Skystars, I reckon send that card, just don't make it too smooshy <img src="/images/graemlins/kiss.gif" alt="" /> He'll be back if it's meant to be, but you may need to wait a while.

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I am curious if anyone has had dreams of themselves in past lives? I had never experienced this until I met the man I am pretty sure is my twin flame. Since then I have very vivid dreams of us in our past lives together. So far only two lives have been revealed through dreams. I shouldn't say ONLY two. I am thankful for being able to see that many so vividly.

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This can happen Skystars. We can receive lots of psychic information in dreams as we are most open at night. I did a shamanic journey to take a look at a past life I'd experienced where I'd had a relationship with my ex husband. When I started to tell him about it he stopped me midway & told me the rest- he'd seen it in detail in a dream.

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