BellaOnline Forums Religion and Spirituality New Age The Mother Archetype In Myth, Tarot, And Life

Hello!

Mother's Day is right around the corner here in the U.S., so I thought I'd write an article on the different expressions of the Mother Archetype:

The Mother Archetype In Myth, Tarot, And Life

Do you identify with the Mother archetype? The Goddess Demeter? What has your experience with with the Mother archetype in either yourself or others? Have you had any clashes or difficulties with the expression of the Mother archetype in yourself or others? What about wonderful stories about those with this nurturing archetype?

I look forward to reading your experiences and insights!

I have a love/hate relationship with this archetype. I identify much more with Persephone than Demeter in that story.

As a kid I saw Mother energy denigrated a lot because of the sexist double standard in the religion and local culture I grew up in. I was taught that women were valued in the church, but at the same time my local church leaders were preaching this, (in the 70s and 80s) the church was actively campaigning against the ERA and the women's movement on a national level, and it began to strip the authority from the church women's organization, which had been more or less autonomously run by the women, and gave it to the male ruling hierarchy instead. (Gee, think they were threated by the ERA or what? ) To me those actions completely contradict the teaching that women are respected and valued.

I could really go on ranting about this stuff but you probably don't want to hear it. LOL I saw how miserable my mother and women were in the church, trying to follow the teachings and be obedient, and yet feeling denigrated and disrespected because they were women, and feeling that they had no voice or power to change anything. I didn't want to be like that so I rejected the whole idea of motherhood as the most valued career a woman could have, which was what the church taught. (Eventually left the church too.)

So now I am a mother, and I'm a Cancer, which is the sign of the mother, of all things! As much as I've tried to reject that energy in myself, what I'm usually known for among friends and family and at work, is being nurturing and caring. I'm the one they come to when they need those things, just like a mom. Ironic, huh! Just goes to show that the things you deny in yourself can come back and bite you anyway. LOL

So this is a tough one for me. I want to own that part of myself but I don't want to be disrespected or denigrated because of it, you know? Devalued because society in general doesn't value women's typical roles. I guess what I need to do is respect it myself, because it is a part of who I am whether I recognize it or not. Thanks for this, it's really making me think about some things I probably need to deal with.

Heather

This is definitely my archetype! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I'm a Taurus, and the Queen of Pentacles often denotes me in Tarot readings. I definitely possess a strong maternal instinct, and a desire to nurture, and I definitely am persistent (I prefer to call it this way, though some people call it "stubbornness" <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> ). I often have a difficulty saying "no" to people, because I'm afraid to hurt their feelings. I beleive that some other women I know share this archetype with me. One of these is my friend, whose Zodiac sign is that of Capricorn. We argue rather often, because of our "persistence" <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> . She says we poke at each other with our horns. <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />
Thanx for this article, Janet! it's nice to know I share some common characteristics with Madonna and Demeter (though I certainly would not like to resemble Cinderella's step-mother! I think I need to control my behaviour sometimes! :angel: )
Love,
Elena

Hello Heather and Elena!

Heather, you and I must have had the same upbringing. :rolleyes: One of the reasons I left active Christian ministering is because of the lip service of the Pentecostal/Charismatic movements. Many Pastors wanted to "use" my gifts of teaching and seeing, but when the rubber met the road, the backed off. I had one Pastor, who was also a sectional presbyter of the denomination, tell me to my face that he wouldn't hire me officially. According to him, it wouldn't be the men that would protest...but other women. (And wouldn't you know it, that's has proven true over and over and over. Many women see an empowered, confident woman, and so they do their best to try to knock them down a peg or spread rumors about them.)

Just a year or so ago, I had a Pastor within the same denomination come over my house for advice. He told me that he felt I was supposed to be the Assitant Pastor of the church. I had counseled him on and off over the years, and I agreed. (He always asked and listened, but never did what I recommended. One situation was so severe, the church had a major split and he almost quit the ministry. If he would have did what I recommended, when I recommended it, he wouldn't have faced the situation. Weird how people value those that can see down the road, but then don't do anything to turn off the road they're on...)

I outlined a plan on paper, he was going to go to the board to get me installed and then implement the plan (he was on the verge of exhaustion). Of course, when he got into the board room, he buckled. But what he did do was take my plan and implemented it...without me.

(Hey, you can rant...and I'll rant. We'll take turns! LOL)

So with that, and not having much respect for my Mother for various reasons, I swore I wouldn't become like her. While I'm not like her in personality at all (she's major Earth energy...a Taurus) I found myself being a stay at home Mom by choice when I re-married. Talk about a clash of ideals! I was horrified.

After a good deal of working on myself, I finally realized that just because my life parallels my Mom's from the outside, doesn't mean that how I function within my relationships, home, and vocation is anything like her.

I haven't had much trouble being nurturing, really, but having a strong Athena archetype, I have had difficulty with letting some (women) see any vulnerability. This goes back to Mother issues and issues with women who are subversive, jealous, and catty (which I felt, up until recently, encompassed 90% of women!) Also, I've had trouble with "weak" women who can't say no, find themselves in abusive relationships, and don't have the self-respect or fortitude to love themselves first. Heart chakra work does wonders. I've just been so hurt by women (always women) that I've formed these attitudes (and walls) to keep them at a distance. Something I'm working on. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Hi Elena!

Bless your heart, you Mother you. :kiss: <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> How neat that you see yourself as the Queen of Pentacles. Although I have "strong woman" tendencies, I identify mostly with The Hermit, of all things! Weird, huh? If you ever need any assertiveness training, just let me know. LOL <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

I look forward to hearing more of your thoughts, guys, if you're inclined! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Elena, I don't want to be a wicked stepmother either! That's cool that you identify with the queen of pents. I know a couple women who remind me of that card, lots of earth mother type energy. I identify with the queen of cups the most.

Janet, I was raised in the LDS/Mormon church here in Utah. Different church but probably a lot really similar women's issues. Sounds like we have a lot in common there. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I never wanted to be like my mom either. She's made a lot of choices out of fear instead of being courageous. It's sometimes hard for me to respect her because I've made more courageous choices in my life, especially in the last few years. But I've been there too. I know what life's like when you're acting out of fear and feeling powerlessness. So I guess there's always a part of me that empathizes even when I get impatient with watching someone flounder around.

Heart chakra work is great! I've been doing a lot of that lately too. Forgiveness, boy what a concept, huh? <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> Good luck with taking down those walls. :love:

I think part of the reason women tend to be that way is because it's not as socially acceptable for them to be openly strong and powerful as it is for men. We learn that we're supposed to be covert and manipulate behind the scenes to get what we want instead of just asking, demanding, taking, claiming, which is what men learn to do. What do you think about that?

I took a Gender & Psych class last year and I could not believe some of the stereotypically female stuff I didn't think I did, that I do! It was really eye-opening. Awareness is a wonderful thing though. Now that I know what I'm doing, I can either change it if I don't it, or keep it but do it consciously. I've had a lot of fun the last few months "doing gender" - consciously choosing when to be feminine and when not to. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I can't say I'm a follower of any organized religion, though I do believe in God with all my heart. I agree with everything that's been said above on the traditional attitude of church towards women. That's one of the things that drives me away from it. I believe this attitude is totally unjustified and deeply prejudiced. It has no common sense in it, none at all! (This holds true for me especially as for the great fan of "Da Vinci Code" <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> ) I have a friend who is deeply religious and can't imagine her life without going to a church. I've borrowed some books from her, the books that dealt with the ideal life a Christian woman should lead, attitudes she should try to develop, etc. I was shocked! What the books actually said, litarally and openly, was that women were creatures inferior to men, uncapable of independent thinking or managing their existence and hence should be totally subject to men in their lives. However weak these men might be, the books taught, women shouldn't show they're stronger or more intelligent. They should by all means try to keep up their men's sense or superiority and stay in the shadow of their great husbands. Believe it or not, the books were written by women!
Isn't that pathetic?
Love,
Elena

Those are the same kinds of attitudes I grew up with.