hello again
just a question
what do u think of those teenagers who get marry even b4 they manage to finish their studies?

Most teenage marriages end in divorce, because most of the time the teenagers are marrying in part to "get away from their parents". That's never a good reason to get married. You should be on your own, and happy with your own life, because you are then able to join your own life with someone else's. If you are running to be with someone to "escape", then it won't be long before you are looking for a new way to escape ...

Hi,

I was doing a book review of Women Who Think Too Much by Psychologist Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, Ph.D. I Googled her to see if she had a homepage to put on my related links section that accompanies articles and reviews.

Anyway, I stumbled onto a study by Nolen-Hoeksema about teens and love featured on the ABC News website. Adolescents falling in love are more prone to depression and alchol abuse--as well as other troubling findings.

I hope you find the information helpful. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

i agree that a marriage should not begin as an escape for one or both partners. marriage is not a miracle solution. it's a life partnership between two people.

what many teens fail to realise is that teen marriage comes with a set of problems that adults do not deal with...

who will your friends be? other teens don't care about paying the bills and what color the living room needs to be. a married teen likely won't care who went to the dance on friday night because there are other things like getting the roast done on time to worry about. a married teen is in between two worlds and fits into neither. it's a lonely place to be.

will you finish school? it's hard to juggle marriage and lessons. without an education, the partner who ends up dropping out is facing a lifetime of depenency on their spouse which brings problems all on it's own. if both do not get adequate education then job possibilities will be limited. the real world is an expensive place to live and it's very depressing to need to rely on aid and live in cramped quarters.

who is paying the bills? see my above comments on dependency if only one spouse works. what if both work...is going to work, coming home with not enough time to relax and be together and then study really that desirable.

i think any teen who wants to marry early should carefully evaluate why marriage is so desirable and weigh that with some very real downsides.

now all this being said, this is a topic very close to my heart. i was a sixteen year old bride and a mother by seventeen. unlike the majority of teens who marry, i am still married to the man i wed at sixteen. i know what it takes to make it past thirteen years of marriage and i doubt many teens really want to attempt this.

i notice here in our country that because of having sex early the girls get pregnant so the result early marriage and they didnt have the opportunity of finishing their studies because they need to take care of their young child
i pity that girls because their parents abandon them once that problem happened and the result is having a hard time taking care of these poor babies

Darkvalefor21:

May I ask what country you are in?

Do you have ideas on what would be some good solutions for teen pregnancy?

Are the marriages between young people in your country often happy and long lasting ones?

hi!
i'm from the Philippines and base from my observations the marriages dont usually last long because the husband and wife are arguing because they don't know where they'll get money to buy the basic needs because they don't have jobs

solution: well, i can't think of a good one but the best one maybe that they shouldn't think of getting married early i think they should focus first on studies

I became engaged when I just turned 17 and only 3 months after graduating High School. My fiance and I intended to attend the same college 5 1/2 hours away from where we grew up...and we did. We were married for 7 years before he died from leukemia in 1996. Early marriages can be done; in fact, many of our ancestors were married at ages 12, 13, and 14--and stayed married their entire lives.

Just another perspective...

Hi Alexia,

While the solution of simply not getting married at a young age is certainly one option, it sounds like the problem is a bit deeper than that. Many teens who are pregnant are in a difficult position.

Do the parents of a pregnant teen often support marriage for the teen as a way to deal with the pregnancy?

I am experienced with attitudes on this in the US but not in other countries. I really am curious as to how the people around you think and live.

Janet,

I also think early marriages CAN work in essence. I certainly have made it happen for 13 years (with my husband's help of course, lol).

What I see too often is that teens turn to marriage as an escape or hold unrealistic views about what marriage will be like. I think if a teen goes into the marriage with a willingness to see reality and an ability to be committed then there is a much better chance of success.