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Moe, I love the acronym! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I have to admit, the word scares me - I actually feel anxiety just thinking the word, because I've spent so many years looking in the mirror and thinking "I'm fat" - whether I was or not. It has such a negative connotation to me stemming from my teen years (for me, the 80s), when one "absolutely had to be skinny" (it seemed) and the skinny girls seemed to be the only ones who were popular, loved, stylish, and happy.

Today, I still face little voices like that, although to a much lesser extent. I now associate more positive things with not being skinny - like "strength" and "sensuality."

But - I still have the mental block about the word "fat." And I never describe anybody else as "fat" because my brain still sees it as a derogatory term.

Of course, it's not really derogatory, it's just been looked at that way for a while in this culture. I don't think it's similar to "the N word" -which some African Americans have been trying to take control over. I believe that word always was purposely derogatory, not merely descriptive.

Tangent! Sorry! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Hi, Moe & Chris!

I love the acronym, too!! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I have decided that my FAT is Faithful, Affectionate and Thoughtful and they are all very positive traits. Chris, you brought up the "N* word" and it made me think of friends I had in college (30 years ago) who use to say "fine" looking girls were PHAT. My son and his group (18 year olds) still use that word. We should also try to think of our acronym word that way...Phat and fine!!

Along with Moe's "plump" (which actually is <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> "pleasingly plump"), I personally like Webster's definition #2. Well filled out (no bones showing!), full in quality (rich), prosperous, wealthy (fat wallet) and impressive are all great descriptions! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

All of this makes me feel better about myself! Feeling better about myself encourages me to continue improving myself. :rolling:

Faithful, Affectionate, Thoughtful: yep, I'm FAT and PHAT! Thanks! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Trish

Trish and Chris, Thanks for posting your thoughts.

Heee . . . I thought about that "phat" word, too! It's funny, because I totally missed it when I was in my "young generation" - and now it's back! When I first heard kids saying it, I thought "Jeez, fat was a negative thing when I was a kid!" <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I do love "phat and fine!" though. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

It reminds me of the cultural differences in attitude I've noticed among women from different backgrounds -and ages, too. (Oh no -tangent coming! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

First of all, I fear that younger American women, regardless of cultural heritage, are receiving too much pressure now to be skinny (with bones sticking out).

But, I've noticed that some larger, adult African American women have no problem announcing to themselves and the world that they are FINE - regardless of their size. And then they ARE fine - just by their attitude and acceptance of themselves - or maybe because they are fine in the first place, but their fineness is not getting masked by "popular" culture standards.

I don't see that attitude as much among white women.

Thinking of cultural differences, the saris worn by Indian women also come to mind, although in a different way. Saris are gorgeous and elegant, and they are that way regardless of the size of the woman wearing them.

You know?

We should throw away all these tight-fitting denim things and start wearing gorgeous, colorful, comfortable saris, in my opinion. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Now, MY ancestors were plump Italian women who cooked and ate lots of pasta. The thing is, they were frumpy - I just can't think of them as fine - LOL. So culturage heritage hasn't really helped me out! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

HeHeHe...Chris, you are funny. Your ancestors loved to cook and ate lots of pasta. So as a white woman, I think of them as "Phat and fine", too. Most of the Italian women I know are just like your ancestors! And I love them to death! (Although they are always trying to get me to cook everything from scratch...like that will ever happen!) LOL <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> So, you should embrace your cutural heritage and cross select other cultural descriptions that fits you. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Anyway, I mostly heard the men referring to women as "Phat and fine" when I was in college. It took me quite awhile to believe that they meant it in a positive way until I looked around and saw the women they were referring to.

I LOVE the idea of wearing Saris...how comfortable they would be and beautiful, too! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Heck, that could even be part of my cultural heritage...Native American meets Irish, Scottish, German, Welsh...LOL!

Trish

haha I love 'Pretty Hot And Tempting'...
As for me fat doesnt bother me. I'm 25, I was in high school when Cameron Manheim recieved her emmy and pronouced that it was 'for all the fat chicks'. I work in a 'fat girls' store. I've always been 'fat'. Trust me, having breasts and a matching bottom are not at all bad things (cept when you have man tell you that you have a great personality and he isnt looking at your face and he has a wedding band...)
But thats a story for another time & I'm rambling sans punctuation...
As for me its Funny, Assertive & Tactile...I was one of those kids that was constantly told 'look with your eyes and not your hands' -sigh.

Also, definition #5; foolish and stupid...my fathers aunt - now in her 90s and approaching deification by cockroaches - ALWAYS used to call us fatheads. Shes a charmer let me tell you.

final thoughts...I was reading somewhere and gabrielle reece went to africa somewhere as an ambassador and natives there said that shed never get a husband, that she was too skinny, she looked ill. And as for most any indigienous culture...least the ones that I've looked into on many different continents...a girl with curves is most desirable, shell bear you good sons without too much struggle or so the thought goes...Oh to be desired for my hips alone...

x0x Wendy

Pretty Hot And Tempting - so,that is what PHAT means?! Cool, thanks Wendy. I like fatheads too. I'll bet your aunt IS a charmer! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Funny, Assertive, Tactile
I like your FAT! Look with your eyes and not your hands. Cute! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Chris, what is your FAT? I'm already starting to look at the word differently...It's just 3 letters that stand for something much more! You! Make your letters count!!! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Trish

In case you are wondering as to some of the reasons why we all get so conditioned against the word fat, watch how toddlers are treated.... This was a topic discussed one day in a sociology class in college.

Shortly after toddlers begin to walk, there are often little power struggles about when they have to walk and when someone will carry them. Many adults who pick up toddlers make comments about how "big" or "fat" they are getting, when in fact, rapid growth is just part of that phase of life. Many adults communicate that they will not carry the child as they are too big, but what gets through to the child is not the overall increase in size as the fact, just the weight element of it.

By kindergarten, most children have consciousness of fat/weight and begin to look down on the children who are the physically heaviest of the group.

Hi, Rae!

So what's your acronym for FAT? <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Trish